8 Reasons Why Foreplay Is SO Important

You’ve heard it time and time again… Foreplay is important!  Foreplay is all of those little pieces that add up to sex that get you hot and bothered.  Items on the foreplay list usually include making out, caressing and petting, stripping, and often oral sex.  Even though, hello, oral sex is sex (especially in gay and lesbian couples)!  But why do we claim foreplay needs more attention?  Why do we put so much focus on these pre-intercourse acts and not just enjoy the main attraction?  Take a peek at my top 8 Reasons Why Foreplay Is So Important and find out all the answers!

1. Set The Mood Okay, we love lovers who are ready to pounce at any moments notice, but for most couples - new, seasoned, or casual - you need to know what’s coming. You wouldn’t just come home and hop on him with full penetration, right? That’s what foreplay is for! All the tiny details like changing into sexy lingerie, lighting candles, preparing toys or lubricants, and kissing each other a little deeper than just a peck let you both know what is going to happen. Both of you can say yay or nay (let’s hope it’s yay) and get down to business!

Just like you wouldn’t hop on your man because of his sheer shock, your bodies need time to become aroused! He has to get hard, and it takes ladies a little extra time to physically prep for sex. Just hopping on would be met with pain and not pleasure! You have to get your bodies ready to rumble and women need a moment of ooh la la to create natural lubrication. If natural lubrication isn’t happening for whatever reason - it’s quite common - than foreplay gives you a moment to apply necessary lubricant. Tell him to use his fingers to make you wet naturally or with a smooth lubricant to make the process even sexier!

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Just like ladies bodies need a moment to physically prep for penetration, women also need time to emotionally prepare. Foreplay, for both men and women, offers an opportunity for your lover to spend time on you! When he’s horny, there can be an urge to quickly have sex. Foreplay gives you a moment to truly be intimate with one another, and create lasting connections within the bedroom.

When you step away from what tends to be a major goal of sex (the orgasm) and focus on foreplay, you can play! Use this time to experiment with new techniques! Where you would usually run your fingertips, use your lips and tongue! Try a bullet vibrator in erogenous zones on both partners. Crack open that edible flavored lubricant. Don’t forget that foreplay doesn’t always have to be a horizontal game! Try hopping in the shower or making out in a movie theater. Let yourself have fun by getting out of the rut of the usual and into more exciting and stimulating situations!

Going along with trying new things is learning about what is and isn’t pleasurable to your partner. Foreplay will help you learn what makes your lover quiver, what tickles too much, and what creates a straight shot to orgasms! Perfect for new couples or those trying to recapture the spark, foreplay is an open book of options to give and receive wiggles n moans! Learning what your lover likes means knowing exactly what to do to them to give you the reaction you desire. Knowledge is a powerful tool, especially when it comes to sex!

Foreplay shouldn’t last forever, but it definitely shouldn’t be a quick smooch leading up to penetration. In fact, in many articles I’ve seen regarding foreplay, women are constantly asking for a few more minutes. More than 5 minutes and less than 25 is usually a good rule, but who’s counting? It’s all about the feeling. What’s better than sex? The art of teasing. Take a moment to be in control and gently (or roughly) undress your partner. Utilize hot and cold sensations on their chest, waist, and thighs to keep them begging for more! The tease is the ultimate build up for passionate sex!

Sex, in general, is a big step in a relationship that creates a bond with both (or multiple) partners involved. Foreplay, and that extra time spent appreciating each other’s bodies, really creates lasting intimacy in and out of the bedroom. Even when the “real” sex doesn’t happen, the closeness, affection, and fun during foreplay can create a lasting positivity! It doesn’t matter what your relationship looks like! The neurochemicals released during foreplay mean happiness and warmth at all times. Hand-holding and PDA is completely optional, but try to stay away from each other with this increased intimacy!

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Overall, though it’s fun to have quickies here and, sex for most women and men isn’t just sex. Nor is sex the be-all end-all of a relationship! The industry has it wrong when they cue up the naughty music and the couple goes at it. Real humans (usually) don’t operate this way! Issues arise when you’re in a relationship when one person is all about banging, and the other is all about the snuggles that come after the sex. Foreplay is a great way to gauge where you are on the sexual spectrum. You can learn how to align with one another sexually by taking the time to play and communicate!