So, when it comes to kinks and fetishes - they are technically two different things. A kink is basically any type of sexual activity that falls outside of what society deems "acceptable". A fetish, which is also technically a kink, is when someone gets sexual arousal from an inanimate object or a specific body part, such as feet. Kinks and fetishes have become more talked about recently but they are still unfortunately considered taboo. However, you've probably seen this types of kinks in different TV shows, movies and even in certain mainstream music.
Kinks and fetishes vary from person to person. We all have different sexual preferences and desires and whatever it is that we like, is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of! There really isn't a "good" or a "bad" fetish or kink, it's really just whatever turns you on, turns you on. As long as you make sure acting these kinks out is consensual, don't be afraid to explore them. Read on to find out 25 of the most common fetishes and kinks that people have today.
Note: You should only participate in a sexual fetish or kink when both (or all) partners involved have shown clear consent. Some fetishes may not appeal to your partner, so it is important to find fetishes and kinky ideas that make both people excited and not uncomfortable. If the suggested ideas do not fuel that sexual fire, than find an idea that works for you.
1. Dominant / Submissive
From the playful decision of who is on top, to walking a submissive on a leash, the Dominant and Submissive fetish has been around for years! It is most common for women to be dominant with their submissive male partners. The act of taking control (or giving up control) can be very sexually satisfying!
2. Furry Play
"Furries" are people with an interest in anthropomorphized animals - animals who have been given human characteristics. One of the misconceptions about "furries" is that it is only a sexual fetish. Having sexual activity with another Furry is known as "yiffing" named after the sound a fox makes while they mate. Although it is common that sexual activity is involved, it is also very common for furries to typically walk around as fictional animal characters that walk and talk like humans!
I think we all knew roleplay was going to be on this list because it is probably the most commonly practiced kinky fetish there is out there. Roleplay is basically when people take on characters that are different than the role they play in their day-to-day lives. A few examples of this are nurse and patient, teacher and student, or masseuse and client.
4. Golden Showers
Golden showers are something that technically fall under the category of "piss play", which is basically exactly how it sounds. Piss play is any type of play that involves urine. Typically when someone fantasizes about golden showers they are imagining someone urinating directly onto their body. However, they could also fantasize about someone urinating on their onto their clothing or they could fantasize about making their partner hold their pee.
This typically refers to couples in a heterosexual relationship when a "man" gets turned on by his "wife" having intercourse with another man and vice-versa. Cuckold is known to be a variation of Masochism, where the cuckold feels pleasure from feeling "humiliated" in watching their partner participate in having sex with someone else in front of them.
6. Foot Fetish (Podophilia)
If you become aroused by manicured feet, splayed toes or strong arches, you may have a fetish called Podophilia - a foot fetish! One of the most common and well-known of all the fetishes, foot fetishists love to look at, lick, or massage feet for sexual excitement!
7. Shoes (Retifism)
Though some may believe foot and shoe fetishists are the same thing, they often aren't related, or seen in the same person. Foot fetishists focus on the human body part, whereas shoe fetishists desire the inanimate form of the object. The sharp point of a stiletto heel or the long, slender form of a ballerina’s pointe shoes are some examples of what would fall under this fetish! This gives a whole new meaning to "fuck me boots!"
Some find erotic pleasure in being tickled! You can be tickled with hands or various objects the same time you are being stimulated. Tickling alone can also be incredible foreplay for some and don't require being stimulated at the same time!
9. Tight Suits
Leather, faux leather, rubber latex and other materials can be made into suits or pieces of clothing that are designed to fit extremely tight against the body. Sometimes it is just the feeling of the tight material against the body or visually seeing someone in the tight outfit that can be incredibly stimulating. In some cases, the smell of the clothing material can also be incredibly exciting for someone.
10. Panties / Stockings / Nylons
A "panty" or "stocking" fetish can be an incredible turn on for someone just visually seeing their partner wearing panties or stockings or during sexual play while wearing panties or stockings. Panties or stockings can come in different materials depending on someone's personal preference sexually or visually. The stockings or panties are sometimes ripped, or cut open to expose genitalia while engaging in sexual acts. Some also stuff their panties or stockings into themselves or their partner vaginally or anally in some cases.
11. Nails & Lipstick
The prowess of a fierce woman is arousing for both men and women, and members of this group fetishize manicured nails and lipstick. Think 80s video vamp with long, blood red nails and lipstick to match and oh! Instant arousal! Whether you’re wanting lipstick stains all over your body or her claws scratching at your back during sex, these two sexy styles go hand-in-hand.
Another fetish that may be thanks to positive reinforcement in the adult industry and advertising is hair! Her long luscious locks and his stubble rubbing on your skin are common sexual stimulants! Even hairstyles like braids, ponytails, and pigtails are fetishized during sexual encounters!
13. Leather / Latex / Rubber
How about the men and women who have a media (or material) fetish? These are the leather daddies and the girls in second-skin style catsuits. Whether you want to be fully-enclosed or “trapped” in latex, or love the squeak of rubber and the smell of leather, these material fetishes are one of the most commonly recognized (and appreciated) fetishes!
14. Body Piercings & Tattoos
It is one thing to claim that you are “addicted” to getting tattoos or piercings. It’s another thing to be sexually aroused to the point of orgasm when encountering a tattooed or pierced body! Whether you’re aroused by piercing or tattooing your own body or seeing piercings and tattoos on another person's body, this fetish makes tattoo conventions very appealing! Stigmatophiliacs especially relish in the idea of ink or jewelry in the more naughty regions of the anatomy.
15. Cross Dressing
The technical term for cross-dressing is actually Transvestic Fetishism. Cross-dressing typically refers to anyone who experiences sexual arousal by dressing up like a member of the opposite sex. Being a cross-dresser doesn't mean the person identifies as transgender or non-binary, it simply means they get turned on when they're in the opposite genders clothing. If you are into cross-dresser than some of the more recent fetishes mentioned may be tied into this as well.
16. Sex With Multiple People / Swinging
Okay, who hasn’t wondered what a threesome would be like? Whether a quick tryst with a couple of cuties in college, or an ongoing fetish, the act of sharing yourself with many lovers is definitely a fetish fantasy! Swingers just do it more often! Some swingers like the aspect of fondling or having sex with another couple or within a group setting. Other swingers will not participate in threesomes or multiples at one time, but will “swing” (aka share) a variety of partners with other couples or within a swingers group! At the moment we don't condone swinging due to Covid-19 but this is something you can use roleplay to experiment with in the mean time.
17. Voyeurism / Exhibitionism
Have you ever masturbated in front of an open window? Snuck away to a bathroom for a little self-love while others were in the room next to you? The thrill of getting caught in the act or showing off your goods (exhibitionism) or catching others in the act or showing off their goods (voyeurism) is very common! Whether you’re simply into watching others undress or you love to fantasize about someone watching you strip, this fetish adds a little spice to the standard in-the-bedroom and behind-closed-doors sex!
18. Spanking & Impact Play
They say with pleasure comes pain, but in this case, the pain comes with pleasure! The delicious interweaving of spanking and gently caressing is a very common form of what some know as sadism and masochism. A sadist is someone who enjoys dishing out pain, whereas a masochist enjoys receiving pain. Like dominating and submissive behavior, in the bedroom this type of sexual fetish can range from a quick smack on the bum to nipple clamps and whips! Have you been bad enough for a spanking?
19. Sex With an Object
This fetish is certainly on the kinkier side but I'm also pretty sure there are at least a handful of us out there who played with an object in a sexual way when we were younger and couldn't get our hands on a sex toy. Basically, anyone with this fetish gets turned on by the idea of having sex with an object that isn't made to have sex with. This can be something like a bottle, a can, a cucumber, really anything that comes to mind! If you lean into this fetish, just make sure to be extra careful since these objects really aren't made for sexual pleasure.
20. Sex With a Stripper or Prostitute
When someone has this fetish it basically means that they get off on the idea of paying someone for a sexual activity. So, when they are paying a stripper to take them to the back room and perform extra duties or they are specifically reaching out to a prostitute to perform sexual activities, it is incredibly sexy for them. If this is something you personally find to be erotic but, you don't actually want to take it all the way to investing in a prostitute - you can certainly role play this scenario out with a partner.
This one is pretty self explanatory and you have probably heard of it or maybe even seen it in a porn before. Fisting is the act of inserting an entire hand, or fist, into a bodily orifice such as a vagina or a rectum. If you do decide to take part in fisting, please be sure to stock up on your lube before hand because it is going to be really important for whoever is on the receiving end. And of course, always, always ask for consent.
22. Orgasm Control (Edging)
Orgasm control can be done in a few different ways, and again, this one leans into the dominant/submissive fetish. The first way this fetish can be played out is if the dominant is in control of when the submissive partner gets to orgasm. The submissive would most likely be restrained and right as they are about to orgasm the dom will completely stop whatever they were doing that was giving their partner pleasure. Another way of experimenting with edging is to simply do it on your own. When you're masturbating right as you're about to cum, stop giving yourself pleasure. Then start again and build up to orgasm again, then repeat the process until eventually you're able to have a massive orgasm.
23. Breath Play
Breath play falls under the BDSM category. One way of doing this, which is actually pretty dangerous, is having your breathing restricted during a sexual activity. However, there is another way of exploring with breath play that is less dangerous. If someone is into this they can hold their own breath during a sexual activity, this way they have control over it if they really need to take a breath but it will still lean into that fetish.
24. Sadism & Masochism
The definition of a sadist is someone who gets sexual pleasure out of conflicting pain on another person or humiliating that person. Whereas a masochist is someone who gets sexual pleasure out of receiving that pain and that humiliation. If you are one of these and your partner is the other, then you are in for a wild and incredibly sexy ride with one another.
25. Rope Bondage
Rope bondage is pretty much exactly what you think it is. This ties into the dominant/submissive fetish I mentioned earlier. Typically the more dominant partner will restrain the submissive partner with rope made specifically for sexual play. Rope bondage can be simple where you are tying your lover's arms together and their feet together. Or, it can be more intense if the dominant person really leans into it and starts to learn intricate knot tying techniques.