A Step-By-Step Guide on How To Use A Dildo

Illustrations of different types of dildos

Dildos, versatile and popular sex toys, offer individuals a pathway to pleasure and self-exploration.

Whether you're a beginner or someone looking to enhance your solo or partnered experiences, understanding how to use a dildo effectively can unlock a world of sexual satisfaction.

In this comprehensive guide, we will take you through the ins and outs of using a dildo. From choosing the right type to exploring various techniques, we'll provide step-by-step instructions and valuable tips for an enjoyable journey of self-discovery.

Selecting the Perfect Dildo

Before embarking on your dildo adventure, it's essential to choose the right one that suits your preferences and desires.

Here are some factors to consider when selecting the perfect dildo:

Size Matters

Dildos come in different sizes from small and slim beginner models to larger options for those seeking more intensity. If you're new to using dildos, starting with a smaller size can help you ease into the experience. On the other hand, if you're craving a fuller sensation, opting for a larger size might be more suitable.

Shop the different dildo size options available at TooTimid:

Material Options

Dildos are available in various materials including silicone, glass, metal, and even realistic skin-like materials such as dual-density silicone or TPE. Each material offers unique sensations and benefits. Silicone dildos are body-safe, easy to clean, and often have a lifelike feel. Glass and metal dildos are firm and allow for temperature play by warming or cooling them before use.

Dildo material options and their benefits infographic

Shape and Texture

Consider whether you prefer a straight or curved dildo. Curved dildos are excellent for targeting specific pleasure points like the G-spot or prostate. Textured dildos can provide extra stimulation by featuring ridges, bumps, or swirls along their shafts.

Once you've considered these factors based on your preferences, you're ready to move on to the next step: learning how to use a dildo effectively.

Browse our best-selling dildo options at TooTimid:

Step-by-Step Guide: Using a Dildo

To maximize your pleasure and ensure a safe and enjoyable experience, follow these step-by-step instructions on using a dildo:

Step 1: Prepare Yourself and Your Dildo

Before diving into the excitement, take some time for personal preparation. Ensure that both you and your dildo are clean. Wash your hands thoroughly, and if it's your first time using the dildo or sharing it with a partner, give it a gentle wash with warm water and mild soap or use a sex toy cleaner. Remember to check for any signs of damage or wear before use.

TooTimid Foaming Toy Cleaner

Step 2: Set the Mood

Creating a sensual atmosphere can enhance your overall experience. Dim the lights, play some soft music, or light scented candles – whatever helps you feel relaxed and comfortable.

Step 3: Apply Lubrication

Using lube is essential for comfortable penetration and reducing friction. Apply water-based lubricant generously to both yourself and the dildo. This will ensure smooth gliding and prevent any discomfort during insertion.

TooTimid Water-Based Lube

Step 4: Find Your Ideal Position

Experimenting with different positions can help you find what feels best for you. Some popular options include lying on your back with knees bent, squatting, or propping up pillows to elevate your hips for maximum G-Spot pleasure. Find a position that allows easy access to your erogenous zones while maintaining comfort.

Step 5: Insertion Techniques

When it comes to inserting the dildo, there are various techniques you can explore:

  • Twisting Motion: Gently twist the dildo as you gradually insert it. This motion can create additional stimulation as the textured surface moves against sensitive nerve endings.

  • Spreading Labia: For those with vulvas, spreading the labia apart slightly can help guide the dildo toward the vaginal opening, making insertion smoother.

  • Clit Rubbing: During insertion, use your free hand to gently massage or rub your clit. This simultaneous clitoral stimulation can heighten arousal, making the insertion process more comfortable and enjoyable. As you continue inserting the dildo, adjust the pressure and speed of your clit rubbing to match your preference and intensity level. Add a dab of clit arousal gel to intensify the sensations!

Step 6: Finding Your Pleasure Points

Once the dildo is inserted, take a moment to explore and discover your pleasure points. Experiment with thrusting motions, varying speeds, and depths of penetration. Pay attention to what feels pleasurable for you and adjust accordingly.

Techniques for Added Pleasure and Variety

Using a dildo doesn't have to be limited to traditional penetration. Here are some additional techniques and tips to explore:

Mushroom Tip Pop - Just The Tip!

If your dildo has a bulbous or pronounced head, experiment with popping just the tip in and out for intense stimulation.

Applying Pressure On The Vaginal Wall

While employing the Mushroom Tip Pop technique, you can further enhance the pleasure by applying pressure on the vaginal wall. This can be done by pressing the dildo downwards towards the vagina after inserting just the tip.

The pressure applied stimulates the sensitive nerves in the vaginal wall, leading to intense pleasure.

Experiment with varying pressures and angles to discover what feels best for you. Always remember to proceed at a comfortable pace and in a manner that ensures your safety and enjoyment.

Deep Diving Depths

Deep thrusting involves pushing the dildo in as far as it will comfortably go and using long, slow, deep thrusts. This method can stimulate areas deeper within the vagina or anus, providing intense pleasure. Here's how to use a dildo with the deep thrusting technique:

  • Start Slowly: Begin with shallow thrusts, gradually inserting the dildo deeper with each thrust. This allows your body to adjust and warm up to the depth.

  • Use Lubrication: Ensure that you use plenty of lubricant, reapplying as needed. The deep thrusting technique can cause more friction than shallower methods, making lubrication especially important.

  • Listen to Your Body: Go as deep as you desire while maintaining comfort for your body. If you experience any discomfort or pain, stop immediately. It's crucial to listen to your body's signals and never push past your comfort level.

  • Experiment with Angles and Speeds: Try altering the angle of your thrusts to stimulate different areas. Additionally, vary the speed of your thrusts - you may find slow, deliberate thrusts or faster, more intense thrusts more pleasurable.
   
Did You Know?

An interesting fact about dildo use is the prevalence and acceptance it has gained over time. According to a study published by the Archives of Sexual Behavior, nearly 53% of women and 45% of men aged 18-65 reported using a sex toy such as a dildo in their lifetime, (Zucker, 2023). 

This showcases the growing acceptance and normalization of sex toys in sexual exploration and pleasure enhancement.

Surfing the Shallows

Shallow play can offer intense sensation without deep penetration. This technique primarily stimulates the first one to three inches of the vagina or anus, an area rich in nerve endings. Here's how to use a dildo with the shallow play technique:

  • Begin with the Tip: Start by inserting just the tip of the dildo, adjusting to its feel and girth. This involves little penetration and focuses on the highly sensitive nerve endings near the entrance of the vagina or anus.

  • Gradual Shallow Thrusts: Once comfortable, initiate shallow thrusts, keeping the movements within the first few inches. The idea is not to go deep, but to create pleasure by focusing on the nerve-rich areas near the surface.

  • Explore Different Motions: Experiment with different motions – try twisting, turning, or back-and-forth movements with the dildo. Each action can offer a distinct sensation, enhancing the overall experience.

G-Spot Milking

For individuals with a vagina, the G-spot, located about 1-2 inches inside the front wall of the vagina, can offer intense pleasure when stimulated. One effective way to stimulate this area is through a technique often referred to as 'G-Spot Milking.' Here's how to use a dildo for G-spot milking:

  • Find the G-Spot: Start by locating your G-spot. It's the spongy tissue about 1-2 inches inside on the front wall of your vagina. It's easier to find if you're already aroused, as the tissue becomes more pronounced.

Tips To Help You Find Your G-Spot:

Get Comfortable: Ensure that you are relaxed and comfortable. The G-spot becomes more pronounced and easier to locate when you are aroused, so take time to explore and enjoy your body before focusing your search.

Use Your Fingers: Start by inserting one or two clean, lubricated fingers into the vagina, palm facing upwards. Slowly move your fingers in a 'come hither' motion, as though beckoning someone towards you. The G-spot is usually located about 1-2 inches inside the front wall of the vagina.

Feel the Texture: The texture of the G-spot area is often ribbed or slightly bumpy, unlike the smooth tissue of the rest of the vagina. You're looking for an area that feels like the surface of a walnut.

TooTimid Resource: Guide To Finding & Stimulating Your G-Spot

  • Position the Dildo: Insert the dildo and angle it so it's pressing upwards towards your belly button. This direction targets the G-spot.

  • Apply Pressure: Apply a firm, consistent pressure on the G-spot. You might want to try a 'come hither' motion or a steady in-and-out motion.

What Is A 'Come Hither' Motion?

Curling your fingers (or a dildo) in a beckoning motion, as though you are trying to draw someone toward you. This rhythmic, gentle, and firm curling movement is directed towards the belly button when inside the vagina, directly stimulating the G-spot, and can lead to intense pleasure when done correctly.

The key is to maintain steady, consistent pressure while performing this motion. It's called the "come hither" motion due to its resemblance to the gesture one might use to beckon someone to come closer.

  • The 'Milking' Motion: The "milking" motion involves dragging the dildo along the G-spot with each stroke, mimicking a milking motion. This can stimulate the G-spot and create intense pleasure.

The G-spot is known to be a sensitive area that, when properly stimulated, can lead to strong orgasms. However, it's important to note that the G-spot is also close to the bladder. Pressure applied to the G-spot during milking can often be felt as though it’s pushing against the bladder or roof of the vagina.

This sensation can feel strange or uncomfortable at first but is often associated with deep, pleasurable sensations once you get used to it. As always, remember to use plenty of lubrication and ensure that the dildo you're using is clean and safe.

Backdoor Boogie

Anal play, when executed properly, can lead to intense pleasure due to the high number of nerve endings in the anal region. Here's how to use a dildo for anal pleasure:

  • Choose the Right Dildo: Prioritize safety and comfort when choosing a dildo for anal play. Opt for a model with a flared base to prevent it from getting lost inside you. The dildo should also be smooth and have a comfortable size for you.

  • Prepare Yourself: Before beginning, ensure you're relaxed and comfortable. A warm bath or gentle massaging may help.

  • Use Plenty of Lubricant: The anus doesn't naturally produce lubrication on its own like the vagina, so it's crucial to use plenty of lube to reduce friction and enhance comfort. Silicone lube is typically recommended by our experts due to its long-lasting effect, however, a water-based lubricant can also be used for anal play. You will likely need to reapply lube to the area consistently for safe and comfortable play.

  • Begin Slowly: Start by gently inserting the tip of the dildo, giving your body time to adjust to the feeling. Once comfortable, you can gradually push the dildo deeper inside.

  • Explore Different Motions: Experiment with different movements like twisting, turning, or in-and-out thrusts. Each of these can stimulate the nerves in unique ways, enhancing your pleasure.

  • Listen to Your Body: Always remain in tune with your body. If at any point you feel discomfort or pain, stop immediately. There's no need to rush; take your time to explore what feels right for you.

Do The Twist

The constant twisting motion is another intriguing technique to explore when using a dildo. The circular motion can stimulate different nerve endings in your vagina or anus, providing a unique sensation compared to traditional thrusting. Here's how to use a dildo with a constant twisting motion:

  • Begin Twisting: Once the dildo is comfortably inserted, begin to twist it slowly. You can do this by holding the base and rotating your hand in a circular motion. The dildo should move in a spiral-like fashion inside you.

  • Adjust Your Pace: Go slow at first, then gradually increase the speed of the twisting as you get more comfortable. It's important to maintain a steady rhythm that feels most pleasurable to you.

  • Switch Directions: Try switching the direction of the twist – from clockwise to counterclockwise, or vice versa. Alternating directions can stimulate different areas and offer a variety of sensations.

  • Combine with Other Movements: If you want to intensify the experience, consider combining the twisting motion with gentle in-and-out thrusts or pulsations.

Ensure that the dildo you're using is suitable for twisting, not all dildos may be comfortable or safe to use this way.

Selecting A Dildo For Twisting:

It's generally best to choose a dildo that is smooth and has a symmetrical shape, as these features facilitate easy rotation.

Dildos made of softer, more flexible materials, such as silicone, TPE/TPR, or elastomer, are usually more comfortable for twisting motions as they can flex with your body's internal contours.

A dildo with a rounded or tapered tip can also enhance comfort during twisting. Remember, the dildo should have a flared base for safety, especially if you intend to use it for anal play.

Double Delight

Double penetration, involving simultaneous stimulation of two separate body areas, can maximize pleasure, and lead to a unique erotic experience. Here's a guide on how to utilize a dildo for double penetration:

  • Start with One: Initially, begin with stimulating one area, either vaginal or anal. Once you're comfortable, you can introduce the second toy.

  • Insert Slowly: Introduce the second toy gently, giving your body ample time to adjust. Start with the tip and gradually go deeper.

Pairing Options For Double Penetration:

When it comes to double penetration with a dildo, the combinations of toys you can use are limited only by your imagination and comfort level. Here are a few pairings that might heighten your experience:

  • Dildo and Butt Plug: This is a common pairing where the dildo is used for vaginal penetration, and the butt plug is used for anal stimulation. The fixed position of the butt plug can provide a hands-free experience, allowing you to focus on maneuvering the dildo.

  • Two Dildos: For those who prefer a more intense experience, using two dildos simultaneously can provide continuous stimulation to both the vagina and anus.

  • Double-Ended Dildo: Designed for simultaneous penetration, one end of this versatile toy can be inserted vaginally while the other end is used anally.

  • Dildo and Anal Beads: Anal beads offer a different sensation compared to dildos or butt plugs. The gradual increase in bead size can provide intense pleasure when combined with the constant penetration of a dildo.

  • Dildo and Vibrating Butt Plug: A vibrating butt plug can add an extra layer of stimulation during double penetration. The vibrations can enhance the sensations experienced by the dildo, leading to heightened pleasure. See our recommended vibrating butt plug here.

Each pairing provides a unique sensation, so feel free to explore and find the one that suits you best.

Exploring Positions

Experimenting with diversified positions when using a dildo can significantly enhance your pleasure. Here are five recommended positions to try while using your dildo:

  1. Solo Missionary: Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the bed. Insert the dildo while in this position, giving you control over the depth and speed. It's a comfortable position that allows you to access your clitoris easily.

  2. Doggy Style: Position yourself on your hands and knees. This position is perfect for both vaginal and anal play. It allows for deep penetration and the possibility to stimulate different angles.

  3. Cowgirl: Sit on your dildo, which should be on a flat surface. This position gives you total control over the depth, speed, and angle of penetration. It can also provide an excellent view for a partner if you're including them in the fun.

  4. Spooning: Lie on your side, slightly curled up in a comfortable position. This position is perfect for a relaxed, slow-paced session where you can enjoy steady, deep thrusts.

  5. Seated Edge: Sit at the edge of a chair or bed, with your feet flat on the floor. This position allows you to control the angle and depth of the insertion, and it's also a great position for partner play.

Each of these positions offers a unique sensation, so take your time to explore and figure out which one works best for you. Always remember to listen to your body and make adjustments as necessary for your comfort.

FAQs About Dildos & Their Benefits

Absolutely. Use a smaller size and go slow, ensuring you're relaxed and lubricated.

Use warm water and mild, unscented soap. Some materials may also be boiled or cleaned with a toy cleaner.

Yes, but ensure it has a flared base for safety. Always use lube for comfort and never transfer the dildo from the anus to the vagina without cleaning it first.

Initial pressure or discomfort can be normal as you adjust. If you experience persistent, severe discomfort, or something doesn't feel quite right, you should stop using the toy immediately and consult a healthcare provider.

If you're sharing, it's recommended to use a condom on the dildo and change it between users to avoid transmitting infections.

If you don't clean it before and after use, or share it without using a condom, it could potentially lead to infections. It is recommended to consult a healthcare provider with any questions relating to your health when using sex toys.

There is no average lifespan of a dildo and replacing a sex toy largely depends on various factors such as the product and material. Generally, if you notice any of these signs, it's most likely time to switch out your dildo or sex toy: visibly worn out, discoloration, or strange smell

Silicone is a hypoallergenic material, perfect for those with sensitive skin or allergies.

If the dildo is waterproof, it can be used in the shower or bath. However, be careful with slippery surfaces.

Don't panic. Try to relax your muscles and remove the toy gently. If it doesn't come out, seek medical help immediately.

Conclusion: Embrace Pleasure and Self-Discovery

Using a dildo is an empowering journey that allows individuals to explore their desires, experience pleasure on their terms, and deepen their understanding of their bodies. By selecting the perfect dildo, following our step-by-step guide, and exploring various techniques, you can unlock new levels of satisfaction both solo or with a partner.

Remember to always prioritize consent, communication, and personal comfort during any sexual exploration. Now, armed with knowledge and excitement, it's time to embrace the pleasure and embark on an adventure of self-discovery with your chosen dildo. Enjoy the ride!

References:

Zucker, K. J. (2023). Archives of Sexual Behavior. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 52(8). https://link.springer.com/journal/10508


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