How to Use a Masturbator Cup (Like a Fleshlight): Our Complete Guide

Do you know what a masturbator cup (or Fleshlight) is? They are a very popular type of male sex toy. They are easy to use, with differing textures and sensations and a variation of “entry” replicas (mouth, vagina, anal). They typically have a soft, sensuous realistic “skin” feel, with a variety of different canal textures from smooth, to ribbed, to even a super tight “anal” experience.

Fleshlights can be your best friend for solo pleasuring. You may be thinking that there is only one way to use a masturbator – enter, stroke, ejaculate, exit, clean, repeat – but, there are actually more ways for using a Fleshlight than you think! So, we've gone ahead and put together a list of different ways of how to use a Fleshlight.

What is a Fleshlight Masturbator?:

  • A Fleshlight is a sex toy designed for masturbation via penis stimulation.
  • Unlike other masturbators, the Fleshlight is known for the separate masturbation sleeve and hard plastic case duo that come together to create a perfect masturbation team.

Why Should You Use a Fleshlight?:

A popular reason benefit of using the Fleshlight is you're typically able to train yourself to increase your stamina. So, if this is something you've been struggling with - look no further. The company has created a Stamina Training Fleshlight that is specifically designed to replicate the incredible sensation of sexual intercourse in order to help you find your rhythm and obtain peak sexual performance.

On top of increasing your stamina and helping to prevent premature ejaculation in situations you really don't want it happening, you also get the general benefits of masturbation. If you're using your Fleshlight more then you're also going to experience benefits such as stress relief, better sleep, enhanced self-esteem and body image, improved heart health and more!

How to Use a Fleshlight For the First Time:

Of course the first time you use your new Fleshlight you will want to just try it out the regular way, right? I mean, you want to get the gist of it before experimenting. The first thing you want to do is to take out the insert and place it in a bowl of lukewarm water. This will remove any dust, hair or other particles that may be hanging around on it, as well as warm it up a bit. Then, remove it and shake off the excess water.

Now, lubricate not only yourself, but also the opening of the masturbator. Use water-based lube to protect your new toy from corrosion! Finally, penetrate the opening of your Fleshlight and enjoy the sensations. You can grasp the toy and simply stroke yourself until you ejaculate. Post-play, remove the sleeve, water it out with warm (preferably soapy) water and place on a towel to dry. Remember to shake all the excess water from the item. 

Image of our water based lubricant bottle

Masturbation Sleeve Tips & Tricks:

  • The beauty of the removable insert in the Fleshlight is that you can experiment with heating the sleeve up. While you would not want to soak it in terribly hot water, you can (and should) most definitely try using fairly warm water. The sleeve’s material will hold in some of the warmth from the water bath and create a very soothing, sensual and inviting realistic feeling when you penetrate the toy.
  • What can be warmed up can often be cooled down. If you want to try a cooler sensation, you can soak your toy in cool (or cold) water before penetrating the toy. Keep in mind that very cold may end up reducing the size of your erection, so be wary of that. Also, you can place it in the refrigerator to cool things down a bit. It is not recommended to place it in the freezer, especially if there are still droplets of water on it, because this may damage the material.
  • Following up with the warming and cooling sensation play, there are many lubricants available that would be safe to use with your new toy. The Fleshlight brand specifically has a pack of different types of lubricants, including both a warming lube and cooling lube so you can experiment with different sensations.

  • Who says you can't bring your Fleshlight into the shower? I certainly didn't. The shower is actually a wonderful place for using this toy. Honestly, whether you are taking a hot, steamy shower, or relaxing in a warm bath (yes, men take baths too!), you can and should bring along your toy. Plus, this makes clean up a little easier while you're at it.

  • Sometimes it is nice to add in a little visual stimulation to your play, and this is where watching some porn while you are playing is a fun idea. Whether watching on a computer or on your smartphone, picking a point of view (POV) video may make the whole experience even more intense as you can fantasize about how things will feel while also visualizing it. 

Can You Go Hands-Free?:

You can certainly use your toy the obvious way, just grab the case with your hands and stroke yourself with it. However, there are many ways you can go hands free with this item by simply removing the masturbator from the case. This may take some trial and error, but here are some ideas to get your started:

  • Stick the Fleshlight between couch cushions and either kneel or go at it in a missionary position.

  • Stick the toy between the mattress and box spring and, if you are the right height, kneel and penetrate.

  • Use a shoe to stabilize the Fleshlight by placing the smaller end deep into the shoe, and then placing the shoe in different locations, using pillows or couch cushions to stabilize it.

  • Want to do it standing up? Stick the your favorite Fleshlight, such as the Original Fleshlight shown below, under the lid of a chest freezer and place something heavy (toolbox) on top to keep the lid down. Then stand and do your thing.

Click this image to shop our fleshlight

How to Use Your Fleshlight With a Partner:

While Fleshlights are typically an item designed for male solo masturbation, who says you can't have a little fun with your partner too? Mutual masturbation is fun no matter how you do it and playing side-by-side is immensely erotic. Imagine your lover is pleasuring themselves with their own toy while your stroke yourself with your favorite Fleshlight while watching them... now THAT brings foreplay to a whole, new, sexy level!  

Or, if your partner is in the mood to play too, they can help you out. Fleshlights are easy for a partner to use on you! No more using just a hand and some lube, now your partner can give you some extra special sensations by using your favorite toy. Amp things up and do a sexy improvised 69 – you pleasure your partner orally while they are pleasuring you with the toy. That is a win-win in anyone’s book. 

How to Clean Your Fleshlight:

  1. Remove the Fleshlight sleeve from it's plastic case and run lukewarm water inside of the masturbator to remove any remaining fluids in the toy.
  2. For a more thorough wash, apply a few squirts of a sex toy cleaner and rub within the toy before giving the toy a rinse.
  3. After rinsing, you will want to place the toy in an open and safe area for it to dry. Once it is dry, be sure to place the lid to the toy in order to preserve the material's quality.
  4. Every once in a while you can shake a little cornstarch on your masturbation sleeve after you've cleaned it. This will help to prolong the life of your Fleshlight!

9 Steps for Using Fleshlight for 1st Time Users

The “Fleshlight” is one of, if not THE, most popular male masturbation devices available. It is portable and discreet (looks like a flashlight), well made, durable, and the removable liner feels amazingly lifelike when in use. There are even different varieties of “entrances” available – mouth, vaginal, anal – for satisfying your specific urges. The textured inside provides amazing sensation and the adjustable suction characteristic will really make you feel like you are engaging in sex. While you may be excited and very eager to play with your new friend, there are actually a few things that should be done before you play to make your experience top notch.

Step 1 - Always Inspect Upon Arrival

When your Fleshlight arrives the first thing you should do it remove it from the packaging and make sure that there are no cracks or breaks in the external plastic casing. These are pretty sturdy toys, so the chances are pretty low, but for safety it is always good to check.

Step 2 - Prep Your Sleeve

Next, you want to remove the internal canal insert and soak it in some warm water. This will remove any dust or particles that may be on the canal as well as warm it up just a bit for you for a more realistic feel. You can make the temperature warmer if you would like the warmth to last a bit into play.

Step 3 - Dry Your Product

Remove the canal insert from water and shake off all the extra water droplets. Water doesn’t saturate the canal insert so it is pretty simple to get it dry. Make sure you shake the water out of the inside of the insert as well.

Step 4 - Play With Temps! 

You can experiment with different temperatures if you like. If you enjoyed the warm sensation you can try a hotter water temperature. Or, if you prefer, you can place your sleeve into the refrigerator or freezer for cooler play.

Step 5 - Assemble

Put the canal back into the casing, making sure that the penetration opening (vagina, anal, mouth) is at the wide top of the item. This is where your penis will be inserted.

Step 6 - Use Water-Based Lube

It is time to lube up! Lubrication is necessary with this item and will make for a much more realistic feeling. Not using lube will create an unpleasant “drag” and can cause damage to your penis as well as the canal insert. You want to use WATER BASED LUBRICANT only, as a silicone or oil-based lubricant will destroy the internal canal. Lube not only your penis, but also the entrance and a little of the internal canal as well. Use your fingers to lube up the entrance to the toy. Don’t be afraid to use a generous amount, but you do not need to squirt it into the canal itself.

*Note* There are heating and cooling lubricants available for use, so you can experiment with the temperature that works best for you.

Step 7

For penetration you have some differing options. Try out the varying ways to find the one that is most satisfying for you:

* Standard Penetration: Hold the toy in both hands and line up your penis with the entry orifice. Push into the toy as slowly as you would like. Allow the lubricant to saturate the internal canal. Then, use your hands to pull the toy down on, and off of, your shaft as deeply as feels good to you.

* Hands Free Play: If you prefer hands-free play you can experiment with placing your Fleshlight or pussy stroker in a variety of places and entering hands-free. For example, between couch cushions, between mattress and box spring, or even stuck into a shoe for a standard missionary feel.

* Shower Play: Use it in the bathroom or shower for wet pleasure!

Step 8

Experiment with your suction. The end of the toy (non-orifice) has a twist cap. When you twist this cap you get different levels of internal suction. Experiment with the suction that works best for you.

Step 9

After climax you will want to clean and store your toy for future use. Never just leave the toy with your ejaculate inside, as this will get sticky, smelly and harbors bacteria. You simply remove the insert and clean it with warm, soapy water. Then, shake out the extra water and allow to dry before placing it back into the casing for future play. You should also consider investing in renewal powder that will help keep your new toy fresh and in the best condition possible for repeated play. 

What tips do you have?
Let Us Know Below!

What's Your Favorite Way To Use Your Fleshlight?
Let Us Know Below!

Interested in other types of toys? Read our guide for more info on sex toys for men


  • Michael

    I’m surprised you didn’t suggest my favorite, putting a bullet vibrator in the small end and up your game!

  • Bryan Hubbard

    I currently have the Fleshlight, and it works for me!

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