12 Things He Doesn't Want During a Blowjob
Let’s be honest: for a lot of men, a blowjob is basically a spiritual experience — part fantasy, part ego boost, part “I would like to thank God and also my partner.”
So when it finally happens? They want it done right.
We talk a lot about what to do, but today we’re flipping the script.
Here are 12 things he secretly hopes you don’t do, straight from a panel of brutally honest men… plus what to do instead so you go from “nice” to “mind-melting.”
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1. Whining or Complaining
Despite the word job, he definitely doesn’t want it to feel like one.
If the vibe turns into “ugh, fine, I guess,” the mood evaporates fast. A blowjob done out of obligation feels about as sexy as filing taxes.
If you’re not into it, communicate. If you are, enjoy it — enthusiasm goes a long way.
2. Being Lazy or Half-Hearted
A half-effort blowjob is basically a sensual nap.
Minimal movement, no engagement, zero energy — none of that is doing him any favors.
He wants attention, involvement, and a little intention behind what you’re doing… not vacant stares and auto-pilot motions.
3. Repeating the Exact Same Move Forever
You can find something that works… but eventually, if nothing changes, he’ll start to drift out of the moment.
Switch your tempo. Adjust pressure. Alternate between lips, tongue, and hands. Respond to his breathing, his hips, his sounds.
Blowjobs are all about sensation layering — not one move on repeat!
4. Gagging (Sometimes)
A little gag here and there? Hot. Sounding like you’re fighting for your life? Not so hot.
Some men like a bit of throat play, but when it looks like you might need medical intervention, they go from “this is sexy” to “is she okay??” real fast.
Controlled depth = erotic. Chaos choking = panic.
Recommended Throat Number: Good Head Deep Throat Spray
5. Only Focusing on the Tip
The head is important — yes — but the rest of the penis exists and would also like a turn.
Work the whole length. Use your hands on whatever your mouth isn’t covering. Don’t treat it like a lollipop where only the top gets attention!
He can feel the difference, trust.
6. Ignoring His Balls...or Pulling Too Hard
His balls crave some love, too.
But they're also… not built for rough handling.
He wants soft sucking, light licking, warm breath, and gentle tugs.
He does not want you trying to detach them, surprise yanks, or anything involving the phrase “twist and pull”.
Think “tender affection,” not “yanking weeds.”
7. Teeth - Used Wrongly
Teeth can be okay in very gentle nibbling or grazing, especially during slow moments. But scraping down his shaft? Biting the tip? No. Absolutely not.
Keep your lips over your teeth unless you are intentionally adding the tiniest hint of pressure — and only during warm-up, not the finale.
8. Forgetting Spit (Nature's Lube)
If there’s one universal truth about blowjobs: the wetter the better.
A dry blowjob is an instant mood-killer. Let the saliva drip, run down your hand, slick everything up. Spit on him mid-BJ and go right back to sucking — many men find that incredibly erotic.
This is not the time to be dainty. Messy = sexy!
9. Not Using Your Hands
Hands aren’t optional; they’re essential.
Your mouth can’t take care of everything at once, and he wants that full-coverage sensation. Use your hands to stroke, twist, cup his balls & hold his base - all while you suck.
Using your mouth and hands at the same time is what takes it from “nice” to “oh my god.”
10. No Eye Contact
Every man surveyed agreed on this one: eye contact during oral is ridiculously sexy.
You don’t need to stare him down like a psycho — but a couple of glances up? That’s the stuff he'll think of for months.
One guy — let’s call him Ryan — put it perfectly:
“When my wife looks up at me during oral, it’s this mix of sexy and naughty, like her eyes are saying, ‘Yeah, I know exactly what I’m doing to you.’ I get chills just thinking about it.”
A little eye contact goes a long, long way.
11. Talking at the Wrong Time
Dirty talk is fantastic. A casual Q&A session while his penis is in your mouth? Not so much.
He does not want to have a conversation or constantly answer, “Does this feel good?”
If he’s still there, yes — it feels good.
Let your mouth stay busy in the fun way, not the chatty way.
12. Stopping When He's Close
This is the big one — and the one they all agree on.
If he’s close, do not stop unless he asks you to. Interrupting the build-up feels jarring, frustrating, and sometimes even painful.
If he’s almost there:
And after he comes, give his tip a moment — it gets extremely sensitive.
Pro Tip: If you really want to take it to the next level? Let him finish in your mouth and swallow — only if you’re into it, of course. For many men, that’s the ultimate finale.
If that’s not your thing, no stress. Your hands can always help with the grand finish. Just don’t stop unless he says stop.
Final Thoughts
Giving a great blowjob isn’t about perfection — it’s about energy, intention, and connection.
When you’re into it, when you’re playful, when you’re present and curious and a little messy in the best way… he feels it. And that’s what turns a good BJ into an unforgettable one!
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Keep learning with other articles and guides written by our sex experts:
Two actions I really enjoy. I instruct the woman to separate her teeth and run the teeth up and down the shaft. Second, nibble the ridge on the underside. The BJ normally follows my going down not with my body between her legs but from a 69 position. I hold her legs open and lick and suck her labia and clit until she cums.
While my head is a couple sizes bigger than my shaft im used to a little teeth action but not to aggressive I like to be bit on my head matter of fact a little light chewing is accepted. And squeeze the balls not hard but tightly. And I love eye contact and just stare at each other especially when cuming.
I love it when my girl so gently bites the head of my penis. The sudden shock and fear sends me to the next level and gets me off so quickly!
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