How to Stimulate Your Prostate - The Beginner's Guide
When it comes to pleasure, the prostate doesn’t get nearly enough credit. Sometimes called the “P-spot,” it’s a small gland located just below the bladder that, when stimulated, can create deep, full-body orgasms unlike anything else.
If you’ve ever been curious about exploring prostate play—or have no idea where to start—you’re in the right place. Let’s talk anatomy, technique, and how to do it safely (and really enjoyably!).
What Is the Prostate, Exactly?
How to Find Your P-Spot
The easiest way to locate your prostate is with a lubed-up finger. Gently insert about 2–3 inches into the rectum, curving your finger slightly toward your belly button. You’ll feel a small, firm bump—it’s about the size and shape of a chestnut. That’s your target.
Remember to take your time, and stay relaxed. The more aroused you are, the more the prostate swells and the easier it becomes to find.
External vs. Internal Stimulation
There are two main ways to enjoy prostate play: externally and internally.
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External Stimulation:
You don’t have to go inside to enjoy prostate play! The perineum (the area between the testicles and anus) sits just over the prostate. Try pressing or using a wand vibrator here with gentle pressure or small circles. You’ll feel a deep, teasing sensation that builds over time. -
Internal Stimulation:
For more direct pleasure, use a finger or a prostate toy. Insert slowly with plenty of lube and use gentle “come hither” motions or light pressure. Once you find that sweet spot, you’ll know—it’s a completely different kind of stimulation that can lead to a mind-melting release.
Best Positions for Prostate Play
- On your back: Knees bent, feet flat. Easy access and full control.
- On all fours: Great for partner play or using a toy.
- Standing and bending forward: Works well for solo play with a toy.
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Sitting on a chair: Gives stability and lets gravity help a little.
Experiment to see what feels best for your body!
5 Tips For Stimulating Your Prostate
1. Test Out The Waters
Before you jump straight into toys or deep stimulation, start simple. One of the easiest—and most enjoyable—ways to ease into prostate play is through external touch or rimming (oral stimulation around the anus).
Rimming can be an amazing warm-up that helps you relax, open up, and start connecting pleasure with that area in a positive way. The goal isn’t to rush or “get somewhere” fast—it’s to build comfort and curiosity. Take your time, breathe, and let yourself explore.
2. Always Use Lube
Lube isn’t optional—it’s essential. The anus doesn’t self-lubricate, so you need plenty of slip for safe, comfortable play.
Typically when it comes to anything anal, we suggest using a silicone-based lube. However, if you’re using a silicone toy, you cannot use a silicone-based lube because it will actually break down the material and eventually ruin your toy.
If that’s the case, go for a nice water-based lubricant like our TooTimid Water-Based Lubricant—it’s body-safe, long-lasting, and perfect for sensitive skin.
3. Next, Try Some Finger Play
Once you’re relaxed and warmed up, move on to gentle finger play. Start with one clean, well-lubricated finger and slowly insert it while breathing deeply. Move in small, steady motions, exploring what pressure and rhythm feel best for you.
You might not find your prostate immediately—and that’s okay. For most people, it’s about two to three inches inside, toward the front of the body. Use a gentle “come hither” motion or small circles once you find that slightly firmer spot.
Whether you’re solo or with a partner, communicate and go at a pace that feels natural. Pleasure here is about discovery, not destination.
4. Now It's Time For Some Toys, Small Toys
Once you’re familiar with the sensations of anal touch, you can start experimenting with toys. But this is one area where starting small pays off.
Begin with something slim and beginner-friendly, like an anal training kit or a small plug. These allow you to get used to different sizes and shapes gradually, so your body adjusts comfortably over time.
Recommended Training Kit: Silicone Anal Plug Kit
How To Use A Prostate Massager
Once you’re comfortable, you can bring in a toy designed specifically for the job. A prostate massager’s curved shape helps you hit the right spot every time.
Here’s how to get started:
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Warm up first. Foreplay, masturbation, or light anal stimulation helps relax your muscles.
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Apply plenty of lube. More is better here.
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Insert slowly. Take deep breaths and go at your own pace.
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Find your rhythm. Try up-and-down motions, pulsing, or gentle pressure.
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Add vibration. If your toy vibrates, start on the lowest setting and increase gradually.
Over time, you’ll find the motion and intensity that feels right for your body.
TooTimid's Top Prostate Toys
1. Dev's Prostate Stimulator
Perfect for beginners. Features 10 vibration functions, from steady pulses to rolling waves, plus a remote for easy solo or partner control.
2. Kip's Prostate Stimulator
Non-vibrating but loaded with texture. Its flexible ticklers stimulate the perineum (the “taint”) for full-coverage pleasure.
3. The Tala Vibrating Prostate Massager
A thicker, firmer toy designed for more experienced users. Its powerful vibrations and curved shaft deliver consistent, deep stimulation right to the P-spot.
The Bottom Line
Prostate stimulation isn’t just for one kind of person—it’s for anyone curious about exploring new forms of pleasure. Whether you start with a fingertip or a toy, the key is patience, curiosity, and lube (lots of it).
Explore at your own pace, listen to your body, and enjoy discovering sensations you didn’t know were possible. Because pleasure isn’t one-size-fits-all—it’s about finding what fits you.
My wife started rubbing her finger on my anis when she was giving me a hand job and it felt amazing. Then we herd about prostate organs so I bout a strap on . I was a little nervous at first when I felt the pressure on my anis but I relaxed and when I took it in it felt amazing. I would have full body shaking orgasm without cumin multiple times . Then when she would reach around and stroke me and I would have an amazing cumin orgasm. One time after a good pegging my wife was so horny from that and we made love and I cam again inside her . I’m usually cum and done but when I cum from the prostate in ready to go again it’s amazing and I recommend every man to at least try it you will like it and you won’t tern gay . We have been doing it far years and I have no desire to be with a man . Sorry men nothing against it but I just love my wife and she is the only person that terns me on .😀
It is the most intense orgasm I have ever had. Having my prostate stimulated while being jerked off. First it’s an incredible orgasm with no ejaculation. Then it’s followed up with the most earth shattering ejaculation you have ever had.
Trust me and don’t be shy about anal play. It doesn’t mean you are gay. And it doesn’t mean you’re not masculine in any way. It’s just the most pleasurable, incredibly intense orgasm you will ever have.
OK I have bought prostate toys vibrators
my friend girl has bought them for me I can’t seem to know what I’m doing I wish i could rent a man to show me how to do it to me with his penis, that’s what I really wanna know how to do it is it Harder to do it with a penis I have penis shaped realistic vibrators I prefer The kind that you can sit on it so I can be hands-free I just want to be able to give myself a prostate orgasm or let somebody give me im doggy style on the bed and they’re standing on the floor i got to do that for 30 seconds and I thought it was wonderful I would like to lay on my back I just can’t seem to have an a vibrator in me and have an orgasm unless I pull it out If I edge which I’m a giver of greatness to im getting better at keeping it in Throughout my orgasm
One night my girl started rubbing around my hole. I never thought Id like something like this… But just her getting close drove me to a crazy orgasm. The next time she actually rubbed my butthole and I had another amazing orgasm. We then talked more about it and decided to get lube and experiment… It was amazing. We worked our way up to a very large dildo and I can take it all the way inside me with lots of lube… the key is to relax and just enjoy it. With anal play these are the most amazing orgasms Ive had my entire life. I never thought I would be into it… Seems like a gay man thing. My girl assured me its normal and shes a female its okay and we been playing with my anus ever since… Its incredible
I’m more into Prostate Stimulation when it comes Anal Sex! My current wife or my ex-wife doesn’t care and did not care about having or giving Anal Sex and definitely no fingers anywhere near the Anus! I have heard and learned about PROSTATE Stimulation, and men cumming more quickly and harder when their Prostate is touched or massaged during Intercourse or Oral sex! In my collection of Sex Toys, I have a Waterproof Rechargeable Inflatable Multi-function Vibrating Prostate Massager ( not sold by TooTimid unfortunately) that can give me the best most powerful orgasms I ever had, and without cumming! You have heard of women having body shaking Earth shattering orgasms, this Anal Vibrator/Prostate Massager can do just that! Once I get the right comfortable inflation along with best vibrations, I have hips raise off the bed mind blowing powerful orgasms and without cumming! My wife has also giving me these same powerful orgasms, when we have had intercourse for a long time, of course she asked why didn’t you cum – I can’t explain other than I had a great powerful orgasm. (I’m not a minute man) Now that I suffer from E.D., I purchased from TooTimid a Hollow Strap-on ( I have reviewed) to get our sex life going, and she said it was too big! Since the Vagina can stretch much easier than the Anus, I experimented and found that I can penetrate my Anus with this Strap-on, and take it all the way in with a lot of lube and relaxation! I’m thinking of now letting her peg me with it, to prove that if I can take it in my tight little butt hole, she should be able to fit it into her Vagina to have some kind of sex for both of us to have fun!
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