So, you want to know if people with vaginas can really “teach” themselves to be multi-orgasmic. The quick answer is “yes” – with practice. The real answer is – sometimes. Why do I say “yes,” then double back and say “sometimes?” Well, because in truth becoming multi-orgasmic is not an easy task. All of us have the capability to become multi-orgasmic. YES – I wrote ALL of us!
This is truth, not a rumor, not a little fib to get you to go on a wild goose chase for the multi’s – it is 100% true. The biggest obstacle with trying to reach multi-orgasms is the “pain” factor. You know, that time right after orgasm when you about pop your significant other’s head off with your knees if they continue to lick at your clitoris for one, more, agonizing second! The pain is something that you will need to overcome if you are to become multi-orgasmic. There is just no way around it – but there are some tricks to help you!
Watch below as our sex toy expert talks to you about how you can experience multiple orgasms!
Sequential vs. Serial
First, it is important to distinguish the two types of multi-orgasms – sequential and serial. Sequential orgasms come in intervals 1 to up to 5 minutes apart. Yes, if you have another orgasm within a 5 minute period you are considered multi-orgasmic.
Serial orgasms come right after each other in rapid succession until you can no longer handle them. Why is it important to distinguish? If you are a person who can have an orgasm – stop – then have another within a small period of time, then you are multi-orgasmic! If you are able to have these types of orgasms, your road to serial orgasms is much shorter. If you can’t then you have some serious work to do. So buckle up, settle in, and prepare yourself for a bumpy ride. Like all things in life, if you are willing to put forth the effort, you will surely reap the rewards!
Solo Sequentials Come First
If you are ready to begin training your body to have multiple orgasms, it is best to begin during solo play. Why? Well, a few reasons really. First, unfortunately many are not patient enough to continue oral or other foreplay while you experiment with multiples – they get you safely to that first orgasm and all bets are off!
Second, it is a much calmer, relaxing environment where you can play with yourself in any manner you see fit. This makes for a much better and quicker orgasm time. We all know that most of us can make ourselves cum in a matter of minutes (or seconds) during alone time – but it might take upwards of 15 with our partners! So, take away the stress and do it solo.
Third, you don’t want to feel pressured by them or by yourself. If they think that they are trying to get you off multiple times – they may go at it like a champ – and if it doesn’t happen, they might feel like a failure. Therefore, get yourself comfortable for your night of fun. Get rid of all distractions. Give yourself as much time as you can to devote to your new endeavor. Find your favorite toys, lubes and get started.
I would strongly suggest methods that do not make your clit super sensitive. What do I mean by that? Well, if you use your finger and it takes a long, long, long time to orgasm your clitoris will be extra sensitive (as well as your arms tired) by the time you have your first orgasm. Therefore, perhaps a bullet or a vibrator would do the job nicely. Once you have the orgasm – STOP – don’t touch yourself. If you are using a vibrator for insertion, remove it. Take some deep, concentrated breaths. Enjoy the high from your orgasm. Let yourself rest in this calm state for ABOUT A MINUTE – and then slowly begin to touch your clitoris again.
It will be sensitive and almost painful at first, so go slow. What you are doing is attempting to keep the clitoris engorged with blood. What happens after an orgasm is called a “refractory period” and everyone experiences this. You come down from the orgasmic high and the blood drains from your clitoris (or penis). DO NOT let the refractory period pass without trying to get another orgasm!
Just Keep Going
As you continue to touch yourself, resist the urge to stop. You literally have to retrain your brain and body to go for another orgasm. After years (or maybe not – which would be a great benefit if you are starting early) of having only one orgasm, you now want to have two – or more!
So, touch yourself and remember that it will take much longer the second time around. Your body is not automatically going to sound off a bunch of orgasms. Once the sensitivity has lapsed, go at it with more vigor. Use a clitoral stimulator to assist you. At this point, using a finger might take a long, long time and you may give up. Therefore, I suggest some toys to help you reach that goal!
If you are someone who likes insertion, this would be a great time to start using those toys. If you have never tried a dual action vibrator – this would also be a handy tool. The key is whatever toys get you the hottest the fastest should be utilized now. Pull out all the stops – continue to play until you finally feel the orgasm building again. For many, this feeling might be different than the original orgasm sensation. It might feel almost like a “void” feeling – as if you are not going to actually orgasm.
Remember to concentrate on your breathing. For many, deep, concentrated, almost Yoga-style breathing is instrumental when training to be multi-orgasmic. Stay with it – all the way to your climax. Once there, continue to stimulate yourself until you hit the highest peak you can feel – and then STOP!
After you have come down a bit you can either go for a third, or stop for that session. Make a note of the time. How long did it take you to get from the first to the second? Less than 5 minutes? Less than 10? If it took more than 20 minutes you really have to fine-tune yourself. Around 10 minutes is a good start. Remember, the goal is to have serial orgasms, so try to get it down to 5 minutes. Each time you do this, it will get easier and easier. I suggest you try this activity on your own until you have reached your time goal. If you are just not making the cut, vary your technique, use different toys – buy different toys. Change it up a bit. You WILL get there – you just need to keep going at it.
Time For Partner Pleasing
Believe it or not, I learned to become multi-orgasmic through a sort of unconventional method. My ex, who was very much into bondage, would tie me up and tease me with a variety of toys until I literally ached from orgasming. It would take him hours and hours to finally become tired of teasing me. When he first began this “training” – it would take me about 15 minutes to get to the next one. He would keep going and going until I had as many as he thought I needed. Eventually, I would orgasm serially – over and over and over at a mere touch. This due to his training of my body.
I became so in-tune with myself and the sensations of orgasm that I could literally orgasm more times than I could count. I still have that ability today – and I know it is due to that training. So, even though that guy ended up being a royal jerk – I do owe him that one debt of gratitude!
While I am not suggesting that your significant other ties you up and teases you with sex toys, I am suggesting to you that the method behind the madness actually works. By him not allowing me to stop and rest, I had no choice but to work through the discomfort after the orgasm. I squirmed and moved and tried to get away, but to no avail. Doing this is similar to what I suggest above, only I had no break – not even a minute. Eventually you will be able to do the same.
If you have a willing partner – have them assist you in your mission. Probably the best way to do this is through a marathon of oral sex combined with sex toy play. Most likely your partner's tongue will become a little tired of lapping at your labia – so in order to give them a break, suggest some toys. Whatever will get you to climax the quickest. Eventually, try to work up to two orgasms before intercourse – this will greatly improve your chances of multiples.
If you are finding that it is hard to obtain that second climax, you may need a little help at first. For my one good friend, the answer was an adult film. Yep, I kid you not, I suggested to her that she needed to keep herself in a heightened sense of arousal, and erotic movies did the trick. Anyone can get extremely turned on by watching adult cinema. I know I get very aroused when I watch porn.
So, if you are having trouble getting to that pinnacle a second time, step it up. Get to the first orgasm by yourself. Then, settle in with a good adult movie. Find something which appeals to you. Lots of oral sex, anal scenes, girl on girl, or whatever tickles your fancy. Whatever it is, let yourself go while watching the film. Touch yourself and be aroused and soon you will find yourself orgasming over and over. My friend was able to give herself 3 orgasms during half a movie – which was astounding. Then, she asked her partner to watch with her, and she had even more because they were there with her, and that turned her on more. The point is, sometimes we need a little extra something, and perhaps adult movies are that for you.
Doing your Kegel exercises is ABSOLUTELY INSTRUMENTAL in fine-tuning your body, and increasing your chances of becoming multi-orgasmic. If you have good PC tone, and do your kegel exercises regularly, your body will give up those orgasms quicker than you can count! It is your PC muscle which is responsible for the contractions during orgasm, so it only follows that having a toned and tightened muscle would aid in achieving orgasms!
Therefore, while you are trying to achieve orgasm – whether the first of the second or the third – a good trick to doing yourself some healthy good – while intensifying your orgasm – is to pump your PC (pubococcygeus muscle)! While fingering your clit, gently rock your hips and contract and release your PC muscle – not only will this enhance the orgasm you are about to have, but it will strengthen the muscle for future orgasms.
No matter what, you should always be pumping the PC’S. Keep in mind, becoming multi-orgasmic is not an easy feat. You might have to practice and practice to tune your body to get past that refractory period, to let go and have more orgasms. It is not something to give up on or to be frustrated over. I mean, there are worse things in life to have to practice, right? Just give yourself the time needed, relax, remember to breathe and eventually you will work yourself into having another orgasm within the 5 minute period.
Compound Contractions – Serial ‘O’s
While “Serial ‘O’s” sounds more like a breakfast treat than an orgasmic feat, I assure you- having multiple orgasms serially is a wonderful experience that you do not want to miss if you can! Once you have accomplished the not so easy task of giving yourself two or more orgasms in a short period of time, it is time for you to graduate to attempting serial orgasms.
As I mentioned previously, serial orgasms come one after another, after another until you decide to stop. I must be honest here; there are not many people who are truly able to orgasm serially. A vast majority of multiple orgasmers are sequential orgasmers. Although, having more than one is better than only one – right? However, nothing is unattainable if you want it bad enough.
So, put on your orgasm hat (or lingerie) and get to work. In order to now retrain your body to continually orgasm, you must really put aside that uncomfortable time which happens after orgasm. You should be much better at working through it than you were before you started practicing, but trying NOT TO STOP at all, might be another story all together. The only way to truly train your body to serially orgasm is to continually stimulate the clitoris until you orgasm repeatedly. Exactly as my ex did to me, you now have to skip your minute of down time and keep going after your orgasm. It will not be easy, but in the quest for multi-orgasms, it will be worth it.
Sticking To Solo
If you have decided that you just can’t bear to have your partner tie you down and tease you into orgasmic bliss, then you might decide to go it solo once again. If this is the choice, be prepared to go against your body’s natural responses and do not stop. You will really want to have all your best toys, lubes and tricks ready to continually stimulate yourself.
For me, if I am going for serials on my own, I always choose a Dual Action Vibrator. Why? Well, because once the toy is inside me and I start to orgasm, it becomes harder to remove it – which is good – and it provides fast, intense and, most importantly, constant clitoral stimulation.
Now, if you are not as much into dual stimulator, but still like insertion, then there are a number of great vibrators which might help to go along with the sensation of insertion. Combine a vibrator with a bullet or finger on your clitoris, and you should be good to go!
If you are not interested in vibrators, dildos will also give you that sensation of being penetrated while you are playing. There are so many to choose from. Ultra realistic, Cyberskin, Jelly – you really have to choose yourself when picking a dildo only because of the variance in size and price. The main point is, to keep yourself stimulated as much as possible – and for a majority of us, the most intense orgasms we will have are with insertion AND clitoral stimulation. That is why I suggest items which will help with that. If you do not want insertion – this is fine too. You can use the bullet or the vibrator or even a clitoral pump to get the sensations on your clit to your liking. Switching between pumps and bullets might be exactly the way to go here.
Give yourself some variance – just remember not to let up on the stimulation or you will let all the build-up start to die down again. Also remember to get a good, dependable and long-lasting lubricant. I would suggest a silicone lubricant, as long as you are not using a silicone toy. Silicone lubes generally last longer. Or, use Astroglide - as it is generally a safe, water soluble, long-lasting lubricant. Having a slick surface for your finger or toy to slide over will give you the added stimulation, while not drying you out or causing you added pain.
Once you have your weapons of choice, just go to town stimulating yourself until you orgasm. Once you have had the first one, resist the urge to stop stimulation – CONTINUE stimulating your clitoris. The clitoris is what is going to bring you to the next orgasm. Your ultimate goal is to train your body to continually orgasm, and to do this you basically need to eliminate the refractory period.
Do not let the blood drain from your clitoris – and keep the intensity building until you have your next orgasm. There really is no other secret, no other or even better advice. All I can tell you to do is to keep on with the stimulation until you have that next orgasm. Then, continue again until the next one. Eventually, and this may take some time, you will fire off orgasms serially without even trying.
If you are finding it difficult to continue stimulation after you reach your orgasm, it may be necessary to employ a helper. Just as my ex did to me, you may need to get your partner to continually stimulate you until you have gotten past the pain of the intense pleasure.
While having yourself tied to the bed may be a bit extreme – there are other ways to do this. Perhaps just knowing that your partner is in control of the situation will be enough to help keep you from squirming away. If you do need that extra something to keep yourself still, invest in some simple restraints. There are so many different products for so many different uses.
It might also be of benefit to you to invest in some clitoral creams such as Viva Cream. Creams and gels such as these help to engorge the clitoris with blood. Mainly used to help vulva owners who have trouble orgasming, these products could conceivably help you attain multi-orgasms if you are having trouble after the first ones. Whatever method you choose, just remember that this is a process! You need to relax, take concentrated breaths and above all – HAVE FUN! There is no point in learning to be mulit-orgasmic if you do not have fun while doing it. This may not happen for you the first, second or even tenth time you try – so do not get discouraged. Just remember that each time you are training your body to go beyond what it is already comfortable with. Every time you push your orgasmic limits, you get closer to the goal of multi-orgasmic!
If there was any other words of wisdom that I could give to you it would be this: being able to orgasm more than once is a wonderful thing – but it is NOT the most important thing in your lovemaking session.
Giving and receiving pleasure is the most important thing. If you become obsessed with the “O” and loose sight of sex as adult play – then you have lost sight of the true goal of sex. Also, if this happens, you will probably not have multi-orgasms because you will be over analyzing and over-concentrating. You need to find the pleasure in the process!
As long as you are enjoying sex with your partner – or even solo play time – then multi-orgasms become the frosting on the cake! An orgasm is the reward of sex – what we all strive for during lovemaking. It is the pinnacle of the moment. While I will admit that I would find it hard to have sex if I knew I would never again have an orgasm – having multiples is basically a bonus!
While I did say that all vulva owners can have multiples, I do not know if all vulva owners should have multiples. Those people who loose sight of the moments of intimacy of sex in quest of the multiples probably should be content with their one.
So, if you find yourself distracted by the training to become multi-orgasmic, so much so that you are no longer enjoying sex – then give it up! Having a fulfilling sex life is more important. Why do I give this warning? Simply, becoming multi-orgasmic can be hard for some – just as it can be super easy for some.
For about a third of the people who will try, in just a few nights of “training” they are firing off like fireworks. For the others, months and months will yield nothing. It is the reality of the situation. So, if you find yourself no longer enjoying sex – then stop. Perhaps pick it up again later. In the midst of this gloom I still offer a beacon of hope. If you enjoy sex – you will probably stand a better chance of becoming multi-orgasmic. Also, being relaxed and trusting your partner will make it easier as well. So, go forth and have sex, enjoy it, and PLAY with your partners! This alone will probably double your chances for reaching multiple madness!