It seems to be a regular occurrence in established relationships where sex no longer just “happens” but instead we wait for cues from our partner that they want sex. While sometimes those cues can be somewhat obvious, others may not be obvious enough. It is important that we communicate our sexual desires with our partners so that we are having a fulfilling sexual relationship. Sometimes men have a harder time telling their partner that they are in the mood for fear of being shot down.
SPIT IT OUT
The direct approach can often be the most effective. However, the way you tell her may be more important and ultimately lead to you having sex. Some couples can be rather bunt with each other and you could literally say, “honey, I would like to fuck tonight” and that would be well received. For other couples however, this may not be the best approach and may result in a scowling face and no sex for a week! It seems that the best overall approach is to just simply tell your partner that you are in the mood for sex in a way that emphasises how much you miss her. No woman hates to hear that!
THE FUNNY BONER
Making light of your desire to have sex, and making a joke about it in a way, is a great way to reduce the tension and make the request light hearted and low-pressure. Plus, many couples enjoy joking and teasing so this could be a fun way to indicate your desires. For example, let’s say you walk out into the bedroom while she is reading in some tighty-whities and stroke your chest in the most cheesy fashion doing your best Austin Power’s impersonation, “Do I make you horny, bay-by?” Yes, she may laugh (hopefully) but she will also get the point!
ACTIONS SPARK RE-ACTIONS
There is a reason for the phrase, “actions speak louder than words,” because it is TRUE! Also, oftentimes those actions can double as foreplay as well! Giving your lover the hint that you are in the mood for sex can be as easy as coming up behind her, encircling her with your arms, kissing the back of her neck, and whispering “hi sexy” into her ear. Running her hands down her arms as she is brushing her teeth and asking, “coming to bed love?” can be equally as effective. There are many ways, times and places to indicate your desires and usually will communicate them easily to her. Depending on how your relationship is, will dictate the level of sexual suggestiveness you apply here. For example, instead of a rubbing of her arms, perhaps grabbing her butt may be better! Use your judgement.
SEXTING ISNT JUST FOR TEENAGERS
Many times in our lives our minds wander away from sexual thoughts – we have ample other responsibilities to think about. So, we tend to put ourselves out of sexual thought. Today’s technology is absolutely wonderful for keeping in touch with our partners. Not only that, but you can send any number of memes, messages, texts or pictures to change the overall tone of the conversation. If you are used to getting the “can you pick up a gallon of milk?” text from your hubby and then one day you get a saucy picture of his erect penis under a towel with the caption, “someone misses you” – well, this may spark some interests and change the thoughts in your head! Sexting is a fun and flirty way to tell her you are in the mood.
Finally, one of the most effective ways to let her know you are in the mood AND to end up ultimately getting to have sex is the method of turning the tables and making HER in the mood too! You can and should use any of the above techniques and suggestions to achieve this, but the goal is to make HER horny and ravenous to have sex with you! Combine flirty texts, with suggestive pictures, gentle touches, passionate kisses and let her hormones and desires fuel her desire for you. Soon she will be panting and tearing your clothes off in response to your seductive path. If, after all of that, she is still not interested or seemingly reciprocating your advances, then maybe tonight is not the night!
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