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Why Foreplay Is SO Important

Posted by Mikayla to Women's Issues
Are you a person who really appreciates good foreplay?  Flirting, kissing, caressing, dry humping, fingering, oral sex – all of these activities are considered foreplay because they happen BEFORE the act of intercourse!  For many couples foreplay seems to fall by the wayside after a relationship is in full swing, as if it is no longer important.  Nothing could be further from the truth!  Foreplay is an essential part of an intimate relationship – and it can be more of the main event at times, too!  So, read on and find out why foreplay is so important to your sexual relationship.

WARMING UP:  For women in particular, foreplay is a way to “warm up” and prepare for sex.  Our bodies operate on a delicate balance of arousal and preparedness (and a man’s body is much the same).  When we become aroused, through sight, touch, taste – our bodies react accordingly, preparing us for the act of intercourse.  For a man, this means erection!  For a woman, this means lubrication (getting wet).  Many times a man becomes ready much more quickly than a female.  Women, usually, need a bit more of a warm up to prepare for the actual act of intercourse – this means FOREPLAY!  When we kiss, touch, caress and stimulate each other’s why_foreplay_is_so_importanterogenous zones we are beginning that dance which is sex.  We are telling our private parts – “HEY, wake up, get prepared!  It is time to rock and roll!”  This means a man’s penis engorges with blood and a woman gets wet.  Both men and women respond favorably to physical touch – i.e. caressing or oral sex.  So, from a simple standpoint of what will prepare us, physically, for sex, foreplay is a must!

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ORGASMS:  If I have said it once I have said it 100 times – 85% or more of ALL women NEED clitoral stimulation to climax!  What does this mean?  Statistically, women will have orgasms during oral sex or fingering and not during intercourse!  So, if you skip the foreplay and go right to the main event, there is a chance that your woman may not have any orgasms!  What a shame that would be, right?  Foreplay can be the only time your woman climaxes AND she may be able to climax more than once during foreplay, thereby preparing her for the actual act of intercourse and arousing the male in the process.  Most men report that giving their partner pleasure is a great source of pleasure for them.  So, don’t skip it – enjoy it!  Furthermore, if your partner CAN orgasm during sex, it will still take her longer to become aroused enough to have an orgasm.  Foreplay successfully prepares a woman for orgasm by building her arousal.  There really is no good reason not to participate in foreplay if you want your partner to have an orgasm – or more!

  What man doesn’t like a blowjob?  No, really?  When men are polled as to the one sexual activity that they wish they could have or have more of the answer is always BLOWJOBS!  Why is this?  Well, unfortunately, many women don’t enjoy blowjobs as much as they could be, or, their partners are not performing oral sex on them, and therefore the BJ cycle stops.  Guys and gals, blowjobs are a part of foreplay!  So, if you want your woman to spend some quality time giving oral lovin’ to your favorite appendage then you have to spend some time giving her some oral pleasure too!  Oral sex is an integral – and downright fun – part of foreplay.  You can mix it up with different positions, try a 69 (simultaneous oral sex), or trade off taking turns.  In either event, engaging in oral sex as a regular part of foreplay is a win-win for both of you!

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INTIMACY:  Yes, sex is an intimate act in and of itself, but foreplay can be MORE intimate.  Why?  Usually in foreplay there is a lot of kissing, caressing and oral sex – all extremely intimate acts.  Remember when you were a new couple?  You couldn’t wait to kiss and caress and get your hands on each other, right?  When an established couple stops kissing as a part of sex, this is usually an indication that there is a disconnection in their intimacy.  Intimacy and sex should not be confused.  For women especially, kissing is an extremely important emotional connection between love and sex.  When a couple removes the act of foreplay from sex, they essentially strip the intimacy right out!  This does not mean that sex is not intimate, it is.  Nor does it mean that the occasional quickie is not intimate, it can be.  It simply means that when we stop putting in the effort to emotionally arouse our partner, it can lead to less physical arousal and less intimacy.  This can be the end to a relationship and a serious indicator that there are problems in a marriage or longstanding relationship.


Date 4/21/2015
hurts me if we dont foreplay before sex. its the difference between a good time and a painful one.
Date 4/26/2015
Just Some Guy
I love foreplay. Wife doesn't much bother too much about it. She wants to get straight at the action. Talk about backwards. Been together almost 20 years now, and I have just had to accept that I'm married to the least romantic woman on the planet. Oh the sex is phenomenal for both of us. Long sessions and often. But she just isn't into more than 5 min. of foreplay, flowers, cards, candles, massages, etc. I'm not complaining, my wife is kickass, just sharing and letting others know that it's cool if you don't fit the cookie-cutter assumptions.
Date 5/2/2015
We have not done Foreplay in weeks. It's just so hard wtih kids running around and so little time with both of us working... Guess we just need a day this week to send the kids to a friends house so we can focus on US time. SO easy to forget about that when you're so busy. But it is so very important.
Date 5/15/2015
foreplay is like the only time i can cum. always have to use a vibe to get there. if i dont cum during foreplay i just dont cum at all.
Date 6/18/2015
69 is the best position ever invented hands. fucking. down. both people get attention and it takes care of foreplay really quick if you don't have a lot of time. my go-to. plus she always tastes like fucking god. just tasting her gets me hard and ready to go. Plus if you don't like the taste (my girl don't) then you can add in a tasty lube and boom! No reason not to.
Date 6/22/2015
As weird as it sounds I'M always the one who forgets about foreplay! I always just want to get down to business ... My man is so much more romantic and intimate. I need to remember to kiss him during sex and to put that extra effort in.

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