Whether you are in a new relationship and are working toward sex, an established relationship looking to up your foreplay potential, or in a situation where penetrative play is not ideal (i.e. during a woman’s menstrual cycle, during pregnancy, or for other medical reasons) there are definitely fun and pleasing ways to play without actual penetration (via penis or fingers). In fact, all couples should be familiar with these practices because sometimes it is fun to just play with one another.
SPIDER SENSES: I’ll never forget one of the first times I was with my boyfriend. We were lying on the couch sort of spooning and he was running his fingertips gently over my body. First my arms and legs, then as we began to undress a bit, all over my body! Slowly stroking his fingertips down my sides, my belly, my breasts, my thighs. He would stroke and then sort of “crawl” his fingers over my body like a spider was gently crawling all over me. By the time he got around to “spider stroking” my genitals I was so worked up and near orgasm that it literally only took a few strokes to bring me over the brink! It was amazingly intimate and so erotic. Now I will ask him every so often to do a repeat performance and I have done it to him as well. The slow build up really packs a powerful punch!
DRY HUMPING IS NOT JUST FOR TEENAGERS: Do you remember when you had your very first boyfriend / girlfriend and dry humping was the best way to get off without any fear of pregnancy or going too fast? In fact, dry humping was super exciting in many ways. Older couples sometimes forget the simple pleasures of just melding bodies together in passionate ways. When you are kissing so passionately and rubbing yourselves together, shamelessly grinding against whatever parts you can, his erection pushing into your thigh and her crotch wrapped around your leg like a dog in heat! Yep, dry humping is so much fun – so why do we no longer do it? Well, couples sometimes just forget that there were progressive steps that got them to sex – and going back to some of those early steps can really make things super hot again! This is also a great way to get a little freaky when you may not be completely alone.
The Importance Of Foreplay
ORAL: Is it obvious that oral sex is not penetrative (if you leave out finger insertion during her turn). Oral sex is fabulous foreplay any day, but it can be a wonderful way to get each other off when penetration is not an option (and YES, even during her period – use a tampon!) Oral sex is a logical step on the road to actual sex, it is a mandatory (yes, I said it) part of foreplay, and it is a great way to remain intimate when you can’t have sex. To spice things up try different oral sex positions, do a fun and flirty 69, give him (or her) solo attention with no expectations for anything other than their pleasure. Yep, oral sex is definitely on the must-do non-penetrative fun list.
GIVE HIM / HER A HAND: Going hand-in-hand (or hand-in-mouth) with oral sex is the good ole’ handjob (or clitoral fingering for her). While hand jobs are often overlooked in favor of blowjobs or other sexual activities, they can be fun all on their own! Especially if you take it seriously and add in some nice masturbation oil or lotion or bring your buzzing buddy to the party with you to tease his taint or balls. A quality hand job can be an amazing experience for a man, and a nice substitute for penetrative sex. Now, when it comes to her pleasure, if you are eliminating insertion of all kinds including toys and fingers, then you must consider clitoral fingering. This is when you rub her clitoris externally only (as she would) to bring her to orgasm. Remember to use a bit of lube if necessary and watch for her cues as to how fast / slow to do it. Wanna amp up the pleasure? Masturbate together – either watching each other or you stroke him while he strokes you! Either way, mutual masturbation is fun, fun, FUN!
TOYS: Of course you realize that toys are great additions to any sexual relationship, but they can also be fantastic to use during times when you do not want or can’t have penetration. Mini vibrators and bullets are fantastic ways to stimulate her entire body intensely. A bullet can be ran over her nipples, breasts, back, belly, thighs and, of course, externally on her clitoris! The best part – this feels good when done to HIM too! Oh yes. A bullet on his nipples, inner thighs, the taint (place between balls and anus), his balls, shaft and cock head can be extremely pleasing to him as well. Use in conjunction with any of the above methods and you will have yourselves one explosively fun non-penetrative play!
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