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Porn 101

Posted by TooTimid Staff to General / Misc Info
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It is no secret that I am a BIG fan of adult videos.  I have always found them erotic, stimulating, arousing and even educational.  I have been watching adult videos (aka porn) since before I was legally permitted.  Now, as an adult, I enjoy viewing the occasional adult feature with my hubby as a kick start to our already fulfilling sex life!  So, what do you do if your lover is not into adult films and you are?  Is this something that should be forced on her (or him) – would it cause damage to the relationship?  The fact is, many women and men truly enjoy adult films – but equally as many do not.  There are many, many women who find that adult films “demean” women and put unrealistic expectations of sex into the minds of men.  Let me assure you, while there are adult films out there – not in the mainstream – that can be rough to watch due to the extreme subject matter – the majority of adult films have CONSENTING adult actors and actresses having sex.  The fact is, these actresses enjoy performing in adult films, they get paid well and they even strive to get Adult Film Awards (the Oscars of porn!).  So, to think that the actresses are being demeaned is just unwarranted.


ADULT ENTERTAINMENT

These actors are providing a service and entertaining their audiences.  The variety of films available serve any number of FANTASIES and fetishes.  This is the core idea behind adult film – the idea of fantasy.   Many women feel that men who watch porn believe that “life is just a porno flick” and that they expect their women to perform and act like a porno star.  The fact is, while some men DO think that porn is Intimate Porno Couplerepresentative of real life, the vast majority of men are not that stupid!  To most men, pornos are their greatest fantasies – and it can be the same for women too.  Then there are those men and women who simply get no enjoyment from a film that has no “plot” or storyline.  I mean, let’s face it folks, porns are not heart-wrenching, nail-biting, science fiction rendering works of art – they are what they are – beautiful people having sex!

There is a certain “fakeness” to most adult films – women who are rearing to go when they show up at your doorstep.  Strangers who meet in alleyways and end up having sex on the spot.  Adult films are not real life scenarios – at least they are not representative of most people’s lives.  If you are a person who simply needs some sort of storyline – there is a new genre of directors who are taking you to mind – and this will be discussed later.  Finally, there are those people who may not dislike the adult films, but they have certain “issues” when watching them.  These people are either embarrassed or afraid of comparison.  Women do not like or want to be compared to a “screen actress” when she is in bed with her hubby.  Men are sometimes embarrassed that they can not perform like those men on screen – or – that they get so excited and aroused when watching the films.  Both scenarios make it hard for couples to enjoy the films together.  Basically, there are more men who want their female partners to watch adult films than vice versa.  All my past boyfriends and hubby were AMAZED that I actually enjoy adult features.  I got the distinct impression that I was a rare breed of woman for liking these films.  I do not care, I like what I like.

RELAX AND ENJOY THE SHOW

So, how do you ease your partner into watching adult films if she (or he) is seemingly uncomfortable with the idea?  First, you should never force someone to do something that they do not want to.  I realize that many men sit through the lovey-dovey movies that many women like – but it is not the same fellas!  It takes a lot of self-confidence to watch an adult feature with your man sitting next to you.  There is always that fear that we are not “good enough” or pretty enough when compared to the actresses.  Also, when our man becomes aroused we wonder in the back of our minds if he wants US or the women on the screen!

Listen ladies, if your man is getting excited by the film and is coming to you for fulfillment – why worry?  Men look at porn – videos, magazines, online – and the fact that they want you there with them is a testament to their openness in the relationship.  Be grateful that they feel secure enough with you to watch and share the moment.  Unless your man can’t get into bed with you without viewing porn there is really no issue or problem with it.  It is simply his way of revving his engine – and hopefully yours too!  So, if your woman is adamant about not watching, try to discern WHY she doesn’t want to watch.  I suggest the following steps:

First, assure her that she is your lover, you are attracted to her, excited by her, and that watching the feature is for both of you to get aroused and maybe find some new ideas.  Being sensitive to her reasons for not wanting to watch is important.  I suggest being open about wanting to watch, and suggest she help you pick out a movie.  If she is included in the process, she just may find it exciting and a good bonding experience.

Second, if you have watched a movie with your lover and she was embarrassed, closed her eyes, walked out of the room, or simply said it was “gross” and “obscene” – then it might be time to suggest an educational video.  These films feature real couples, in real scenarios – having sex – but under the guise of learning about new techniques.  They are not as graphic as most films, but are arousing as well as informative.  Perhaps easing your lover in with one of these films is the way to go.

Third, if your partner states that he or she would be willing to watch a video but that she was nervous about it – assure her that you will understand if she doesn’t like it.  Give her the option to stop watching.  Make it lighthearted for her – tell her you want her to point out the women who have fake boobs – or those who are clearly faking their orgasms.  Make it a fun and entertaining event where the two of you laugh and joke as you are watching.  This indicates to her that you are not taking it so seriously – and she may relax enough to actually become aroused.

How To Make Your Own Porn!

NOT ALL PORNOS ARE ALIKE

As I have already alluded, not all adult films are exactly alike.  Much has changed since the first films hit the scene.  New directors, such as Paul Thomas, are making films that are full-length features.  Albeit these films have graphic sex scenes, there is an honest attempt to make the film more of a “movie” with main characters, a plot, even interesting plot twists.  Paul Thomas definitely has thought about changing the image of porn.  If you watch any Paul Thomas film it is easy to see why he is adult film’s most coveted director!  Along the same lines there are many Adam & Eve productions which literally blow the mind of the viewers – and it is more than the beautiful screen actors that does it.

There is also a trend that follows the modern technology – many studios are recording their films in high resolution, with digital sound and picture and are really putting in the effort to make the film interesting as well as erotic.  When you view a film that is done with this artistic style, you will clearly see the difference.  For example, I am always impressed with films by Laurent Sky.  He is a producer who REALLY knows how to add the glamour and glitz to an adult film.  I would recommend his films to anyone interested in the “art” of porn.  Of course, if your heart lies with the classics, you can still find such good ol’ films.  These films are very interesting to watch – because these actresses have REAL boobs, no fake tans and NO SHAVED vaginal areas!  You can tell an older film just by analyzing the women in them.  However, the classics are classics for a reason – and watching them can be humorous as well as arousing!


FOR A WOMAN’S DISCRIMINATING TASTES

It is no surprise that most adult films are not “women friendly” – so what do you suggest if your woman wants to watch a “better” adult feature?  Well, many of the above mentioned features that boast a better story line do appeal to women because they are more than just “wham bam” sex scenes.  Women like to watch adult features that warm them up a bit, give them something else to digest.  These films have a multiple appeal – women like the stories – men like the, well, the sex!  There is also a director who is well known for bringing a woman’s point of view into focus.  Once a renowned adult star, Candida Royalle now directs films that are known to appeal to women.  They have storylines (even if in the undertone) and they are more erotic and tasteful.  While there is sex – graphic sex – the actresses actually keep their panties on for more than a hot second.  In her films the sex is more as it would be with your own lover – slower and sensual.  Keep in mind that these films are a different genre in a sense – they are much slower paced than the average film – but the sex is still HOT!

When in doubt, one of the best choices for a newbie or shy woman are educational videos.  While you may think that these films will do NOTHING for your arousal level – let me assure you, they are just as sexy – and intimate – as other adult features.  There are a few major lines of educational videos, like the loving Sex series which is critically acclaimed and is hosted by Dr. Patti Britton.  She attacks such areas as seduction, sex in unusual places, the proper way to arouse your lover and even Kama Sutra techniques.  She describes techniques and then has real life couples illustrate them.  The sex is real, the intimacy is real, and the feelings are genuine.  It is definitely a great way to start learning about techniques – and each other.  Then there is a random sampling of videos that describe and illustrate how to better your sex life.  As these films are meant to teach and educate – they are less “blatantly sexual.”  This approach definitely appeals to many, many women!


EROTIC INTERVENTION

The important thing to remember about ALL adult geared cinema is that these types of films are wonderful for igniting (or reigniting) your sex life.  Whether you watch them together or alone – adult films can be an enlightening and arousing experience!  If you find your partner hesitant, let him or her know of your wish to be entertained in this way.  Tell him or her you want an “erotic intervention” and explain your desires to become closer in this way.  However, always remember that many people (especially women) are really uncomfortable with adult films – so respect the wishes of your lover and never push erotic entertainment on them at any time.  If you have a hesitant lover, ease them in slowly with educational films as opposed to hard core porn.  You may be surprised as his or her reaction.

In conclusion, always remember that adult features are for adult entertainment – they are not a bible for life or for relationships.  They feed fantasies and are NOT based on realities.  Use them for why they were intended – to arouse and excite you.  Any other use would be an abuse of purpose.  Until next time always remember, sex is adult play time – and adult movies fit the bill perfectly!


Do You Watch Porn With Your Lover?
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Comments

Date 3/15/2015
tommy
watch it by myself because she isnt interested maybe if i get her a girlie dvd she would try it
Date 7/11/2015
yea nuthin hoter
Date 8/23/2015
mr & mrs chase
Not only do we WATCH porn we MAKE our own!!!!!! SO FUCKING HOT!!
Date 9/28/2016
Larry Byers

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