Tips to Improve Your Sex Life

There are many factors that can affect us as sexual beings and any number of these can come into play at any moment. The best way to beat back a stagnant sex life is by switching up your bedroom routine. Get your sex life back with TooTimid’s top 10 best sex tips for couples!

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1. De-Stress

Woman relaxing by the pool.

Prolonged stress can not only create a rift between you and your lover in the bedroom, it can just be downright bad for your health! To clear your mind and make room for naughty thoughts, look into meditation, yoga, and other means of de-stressing. One of the easiest ways to de-stress and improve your sex life is to unplug from technology! At a certain time every evening, finish your work and stop the buzz of electronics. This change from stressful tech to quiet time will create a more relaxed environment. If you follow this sex tip for couples, chances are you’ll have more free time for sexier activities!

2. Go on a Date

Recreating the spark that lit up your relationship can help you reconnect on a more intimate level. Couples can revisit old date night spots or create new ones during a private couple’s rendezvous! Planning exactly when and where you’re going is fine to start, but the more spontaneous you can get at day-tripping and dating, the more spontaneous you’ll be with flirtatious encounters and bedroom trysts!

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3. Communicate

If you’re feeling like your sex life isn’t like it used to be, it’s time to sit down and communicate with your significant other! Our third sex tip for couples involves setting aside some distraction-free time to calmly chat about your relationship. Remember: you’re trying to improve your sex life and win each other over, not drum up negatives to fight over. If you’re having difficulty chatting, try making a pact to share 3 positives and 1 negative every day with each other. This helps reinforce gratitude and positivity for one another, while still allowing the two of you to discuss something that you’d like to change. It can be as simple as, “I love it when you hold my hand in public.” As long as you're talking, you're moving forward!

4. Try Foreplay

A massage candle pouring over someone’s back during foreplay.

Our next sex tip for couples? Try 30 minutes of foreplay before intercourse and watch the sparks fly between you and your partner! Sexy lingerie, flirtatious glances, teasing touches, or the scent of your lover’s perfume or cologne are all great ways to get things started. A massage candle can be used for ambiance, scent, massage, and they are even a great moisturizer for the skin. Give your partner a sensual rubdown and set the mood with some passionate, hands-on caressing. Flavored clit cream is another incredible way to bring foreplay to the next level and improve your sex life. This cream will leave you tingling when your lover rubs it on your clitoris, which in turn prolongs your orgasm. Try different flavors for a sweet treat you’ll both love during oral!

5. Be Spontaneous

Being spontaneous is our next sex tip for couples! Spontaneous sex is some of the best sex because it is driven by lust. Unfortunately, in long-term relationships, we tend to forget how to be spontaneous. We forget each other’s sexual needs and desires as well as our own, which can be damaging for this kind of relationship. Remember: couples require intimacy—both planned and spontaneous.

Bringing spontaneity back into your sex life is as simple as sexy showers before starting your day to midnight quickies after one of you gets up to use the restroom. Sure, thinking ahead about being spontaneous sort of takes the spontaneity out of it, but we doubt you or your partner will mind in the afterglow!

6. Eat Better Together

We’re taking a page from your doctor’s book here for this sex tip for couples: eat better! If you or your lover is stuck in an unhealthy diet, chances are you’re feeling sluggish. Depressed mood and low libidos caused by poor eating do the opposite of improving your sex life. After all, it’s hard to be intimate with someone who has a terrible stomachache or too much alcohol in their system. Learn to cook new dishes together to raise an otherwise ordinary task to a more romantic experience.

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7. Get Kinky

BDSM restraints.

Getting kinky in the bedroom doesn’t always mean investing in hardcore BDSM gear or a bulky sex machine—it can be just a matter of switching things up! Have a chat about a bedroom fantasy you want to try or see what it’s like on the other side of the playing field with some role-reversal. Another cool sex tip for couples: introduce some sexy new dominant toys like blindfolds or silk sash restraints to aid in your role reversal playtime!

Sharing your fantasies with a partner can be intimidating because of how personal they are, but these fantasies can also improve your sex life. The best sex happens when you are both comfortable enough to communicate your desires, so don’t be shy. Chances are your partner has a few kinky wants of their own that will come out once you start a dialogue! Bring up role-playing or even try talking dirty just for a little extra spice.

8. Use Sex Toys

Introducing a new toy in the bedroom might be our favorite sex tip for couples! Toys can be the gateway to lots of thrilling new options during sex. Even those who have never dreamt of sex toys before can enjoy changing it up with a little buzz from a vibrator, or wearing a cock ring to make sex last longer and provide clit stimulation! Think of it as a kind of present that you both get to experience as you unwrap each other.

9. Sleep Hard

Changing your sleeping patterns can also have a drastic effect on your sexual health—both positively and negatively. If you are too exhausted to spend a few extra minutes making out with your significant other, our sex tip for couples here is to reevaluate when and how you sleep. Your bedroom should really only be a place for sleeping and sex! Simple changes like adding a fan in your bedroom to provide white noise and a flow of air or adding A/C to create a cooler bedroom can improve your sex life. Or, add room-darkening shades and wake up and head to bed a little earlier each day to help your snooze patterns! You’ll be sleeping better in no time, and these improvements will give you more energy and more flexibility to be sexually spontaneous!

10. Have Fun

Our last sex tip for couples is to remember that great sex doesn’t have to be complicated and serious all the time—just intimate! Sometimes the best sexual encounters start with jokes. Start a tickle fight! Get to wrestling! Be silly! Remove yourselves from the same old, same old, and explore the world around you by taking trips to museums! Lots of libraries host free movie screenings and discussions, which might be just the intellectual stimulation you need to flip the switch from mundane to thrilling. Plan days throughout the month where you take day trips and adventures exploring new experiences. If the connection between you two is flickering, go play! Having fun and enjoying each other’s company is a great way to cement your bond and improve your sex life and overall relationship.

What tips do you have to for better sex in your relationship?

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