BE A GIVER: I know that this is an article about how to GET what YOU want in bed and the first thing on the to-do lists is to GIVE. Confused? Listen, this is very simple: if you pleasure your woman without any regard to your own satisfaction, she will definitely want to please you as much as she possibly can! Your selfless giving of oral sex, your willingness to allow her to have as much foreplay as she wants, your undying attention to her erogenous zones – all of this does NOT go unnoticed! Women notice these things and when they notice them, they want to make sure that you will keep doing those things and to do that they know they have to give YOU what YOU want too! Make sense? Got it? Good. Be a giver, dude.
BE REALISTIC: If what you want in bed is for your girlfriend to invite 4 of her besties into the bedroom and have a giant orgy with you front and center – well, it probably isn’t gonna happen. There are some things that you may want that may just have to be left for your dreams. Be realistic in what you want in the bedroom. This does not mean that your fantasy of having a threesome is off the table – it can be ON the table as a possibility. However, you have to be realistic about whether you are actually going to get this. Don’t ever think that pushing your partner to do or try things that she is adamantly against is going to work in your favor – it won’t. Just be realistic and ask for the things you really want.
BE HONEST: If you are unsatisfied in bed – be honest! Tell her in a very gentle way so that she knows what she can do to make things better for the both of you. Have a conversation outside of the bedroom where you both tell each other what you want, need or want to try in the bedroom. If you find her blowjobs to be a little more pain than pleasure – TELL HER! If she never gets on top and you would like her to take the lead every so often – TELL HER. Women are not mind readers and we do not always know that you are unsatisfied. So, if you are, tell her. Just remember to be gentle and loving and patient and make sure she feels like she is important and valued.
BE COMPLIMENTARY: Women thrive on compliments. We like to be told we are sexy, beautiful, hot – what have you. We really do want to keep doing those things in bed that you LOVE. So, if she is giving you a great BJ and she does a move that you love – TELL HER! Tell her right then, “oh baby, that move you do with your hands on my shaft is amazing and feels SO good!” She will take a mental note of that and want to repeat the motion. So, you get what you want (more of that killer BJ move) and she feels like a sex goddess between your legs! This goes with anything she does that you like and want more of. She is on top – tell her how sexy she is up there! You are doing it doggy – tell her that her ass is amazing. Trust me, it works!
BE PATIENT AND UNDERSTANDING: OK so you really want to have anal sex. You know your partner doesn’t really want to try that, but you still do. You can’t get the idea out of your head. It is something you really want to do. How can you get her to do it? Well, the truth is, you may not be able to. Some activities may just be impossible or unappealing to your partner. Or, they may scare her a bit. Using anal sex only as an example, if this is what you want then you have to be patient. You have to explain to her why you want it, how you think it will please you AND her, and you have to be patient in having her try it. Furthermore, if she does try it and doesn’t like it, you have to be understanding about it. If you are, she is more likely to try the desired activity at a later date! Nothing good ever comes of being pushy – be patient and understanding and you have a much greater chance for sexual success!
How Do You Get What You Want In Bed?
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