Have you been considering trying anal sex? Does the idea intrigue you, yet sort of scare you at the same time? Are you worried about it being “dirty” – literally and figuratively? Well, if you are a newbie to anal sex and are contemplating taking a stroll down anal avenue, this article will give you some great advice for the anal newbie! Anal sex can be a very pleasant and exciting part of a sexual relationship that doesn’t have to be scary, dirty or painful!
Intro Thought: Anal sex should never hurt! Is it uncomfortable during those first moments – yes. However, it should not HURT! If it does you need to use more lube and try to relax! No sex act should hurt and anal sex is a sex act.
LUBE, LUBE and MORE LUBE: The absolute first and most important tip for anyone engaging in anal sex is this: YOU NEED LUBE! The anal canal is NOT self-lubricating – meaning, it will be dry and can be very painful if you do not use lubricant. No, spit (saliva) is not enough! You need real, honest to goodness lube! I suggest silicone as it is slippery and long-lasting. You really can’t overdo the lube when it comes to anal sex. If someone has told you the myth of “don’t use lube it will ruin the experience” then they do not know how absolutely painful it can be for the receiver if there is no lube to pave the way. Use lube. Use lots. Keep it handy, you’ll use more. Lube. Can I say it enough: LUBE!
10 Facts About Anal Sex
PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE: Contrary to what you may have seen in pornos, you can’t just ram your penis (or a toy) into the anal canal. It will HURT! Most of the times the actresses in these films have already been primed (see the next suggestion) and this makes it much easier going. If you want to have a pleasurable anal sex experience you must use lube and go SLOWLY into that dark.....you get the drift, right? Have your partner go very, very slowly. The receiver (the one who is receiving the anal sex) should tell the giver when to push, when to stop, when to continue. This way, you can slowly adjust to the new entity entering your exit only canal. If you have a partner who you cannot trust to be patient and go slowly then he is not the right person to have anal sex with! Anal newbies tend to need a long time to adjust – so be patient!
PRIME SUSPECT: It is usually a really good idea for an anal newbie to “prime” the entrance in preparation for the main event. This means: invest in a medium size butt plug. Butt plugs are designed to fit smoothly into the anal canal and are usually made of a material that is comfortable to insert. If you experiment pre-anal sex with butt plugs and experience the pleasure of being anally stimulated you are less likely to be nervous when it comes to having anal sex. Furthermore, you can use a butt plug to stretch the anal canal prior to anal sex so that the actual penile penetration is less, um, uncomfortable. You know what they say: an ounce of preparation is worth a pound of regret.
CAN’T CLENCH: OK, so let’s be real here: when someone tries to stick something up your anal canal your first reaction is to do what? TO CLENCH DOWN! It’s the “oh hell no, nothing is going UP there” response. It is natural. It is going to happen. So, you have to resist the urge to clench and RELAX! Furthermore, when it is time for insertion (after you have lubed and primed) you should do this one, very important thing: push like you are having a bowel movement! Yes, I am serious. No, you won’t poop yourself. When we push OUT it OPENS the anal canal, thereby creating less resistance to the object being inserted. It will make the insertion process a thousand times more comfortable – I guarantee it! So, no clenching, relax and push OUT! You can do it!
Mikayla’s tip: Anal sex is not for everyone. If you have a partner who is reluctant to try it, don’t push it. It is fun and can be very, very pleasurable for both partners – but it won’t be any fun if someone is hurt. Always be conscious of your partner’s needs and be patient!
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