Posted by TooTimid Staff on 6/1/2008 to "How To" Guides

As time goes by, I am reminiscent of all the reasons that I am thankful – one BIGGIE being my hubby! I am graced to have a wonderful man and partner in my hubby – and I like to think that I try to show him in many different words and deeds just how thankful I am to have him in my life – and the lives of my children!

I was thinking that we all should express our gratitude and thankfulness for our lovers – and there are some super sexy ways to do this. This article will attempt to give everyone who is lucky enough to have a ‘someone special’ in their life some cute, fun and erotic ways to say: I AM THANKFUL YOU ARE MINE!

is for ‘TRUST’
I am sure most people will agree with me when I say that having trust in a relationship is vitally important. There are many kinds of trust – and there is definitely a unique brand of ‘sexual trust.’ What do I mean by this? Well, for example, if you would trust your lover to blindfold you and restrain you – then take their wildest fantasies and run wild with them – then you have ‘sexual trust!’

If you want to show your lover how thankful you are for them – then why not offer to play the ultimate game of trust? Offer to allow your lover to tie you up with some RESTRAINTS or BLINDFOLD you with a simple blindfold and have his / her way with you! Adding such a sex game to your relationship brings you closer, and shows him or her just how special they are to you!

is for ‘HONESTY’
Along with the notion of trust comes the importance of being honest with your partner. This can encompass a whole bunch of things – but it also can mean something just as simple as telling your partner what does and does not turn you on! Many couples find it hard to discuss their sexual desires – but in any successful relationship, honesty is really one of the most important facets.

If your partner does something that you do not like – or if you want them to spend a little more time or effort on a particular part of your anatomy – TELL THEM! If you want more sex, more foreplay, more locations – TELL THEM. If you want to experiment with toys, bondage, kinky sex – TELL THEM! Basically, once you begin to share all your wants and desires with them – then you can only get closer and your sex can only become more fulfilling. This is something you both will be thankful for!

is for ‘ALWAYS’
Yes, I said ALWAYS. Always what you may ask? Well simply: always be true to yourself; always be honest with your lover; always be forthright with your wants and desires; always get out of bad relationships or get help; always show your lover just how important they are to you and how thankful you are to have them in your life. ALWAYS be cognizant of your and your partner’s needs in the bedroom. If you do this, you will have a wonderful, fulfilling relationship!

is for ‘NEWNESS’
Not every relationship is new – but it can always FEEL like it is! How can you do this? You can try to keep the love and sexual flames alive by remembering why you fell in love or lust with your partner. Remembering and acting upon those first fluttery feelings is a guaranteed way to keep your relationship fresh and new.

Urgency and urgent sex is a main part of a new relationship. Those moments when you JUST HAVE to HAVE your lover or you will feel incomplete. Those first kisses, touches, caresses. The first time you slept with your lover or told them you loved them. This is something that you can reclaim – if you have the urge to do so. These feelings do not go away after years of marriage or a relationship – what they do is sort of hide under the surface.

Remembering to ‘date’ your partner is one of the best ways to keep things alive. You have to make private time for you and your lover – this means dating, romancing, having fun. Remembering to tell them how attractive they are, how much you desire them, or how much you love them – just like you did in the beginning of your relationship – is also a great way to keep things alive and kickin’ in the sex department. Basically, never let your relationship die – always take time to admire your partner and acknowledge all the reasons you fell for them in the first place!

is for ‘KINKY’
Sometimes relationships need a little……something more. For many couples, getting a little kinky is the best way to do this. You have to remember to be sensitive to your partner’s limitations when going the kinky route – but every couple can practice at least a little kinky sex. For those who want to keep things a little tamer – there are things like EDIBLE BODY PAINTS OR MASSAGE OILS, FURRY HANDCUFFS, BLINDFOLDS. Then, if you feel like stepping it up a notch – RESTRAINTS, MINI WHIPS or FETISH ITEMS, such as BALL GAGS can be taken into the bedroom!

When couples get a little kinky in their bedrooms this spices up the relationship. Oftentimes, one partner wanted to bring things up a notch but the other partner didn’t know. So, if you are thinking about it – tell your partner and see where you can take your relationship! The odds are, both of you will find some new sexual practices that will help bond you in ways that you never expected.

is for ‘FOREPLAY’
Need I say this, sex should always be FUN! Sex should never be the 2 minute quickie on Friday night right after the kids go to bed. Well, maybe not ‘never’ but on average, sex should be an experience! Sex should be filled with FOREPLAY, and this foreplay should be mutually pleasing! One of the best ways to show your lover just how lucky and thankful you are to have them is to give them ooooddles of pleasure! Foreplay is the best way to do this!

Sex is great – but sex is not just ‘penile in vagina’ penetration. Sex is an event – a sharing time with your partner. Foreplay is not the frosting on the cake – but instead the sugar IN the cake! If you do not put sugar in your cake, who would want to eat it? NO ONE! Remember that just adding foreplay – or MORE foreplay – to your sexual time is one of the best ways to bring you closer. Foreplay should include things like kissing, touching, caressing, fondling and oral sex. It MAY include sex toys as well. Foreplay is the heat in the moment – so if you are not already, remember to add in the foreplay – and if you are – add MORE!!!

is for ‘UNDERSTANDING’
I think it goes without saying that sex should be a mutually desired event. If your partner says “not tonight” for whatever reason, you should understand. If your partner is feeling a little ‘unsexy’ or ‘undesired’ – don’t get mad, understand and try to help. If you partner is tired and just not in the mood – despite your best efforts – UNDERSTAND!

Partners have to be on board with the differing moods of the other. This includes times when sex is just not something that is going to happen. Being understanding about all the events in life is one of the best ways to show appreciation for your partner. Conversely, if your partner has been very accommodating of your lack of desire or need to take a sexual break – UNDERSTAND that they are going to want intimacy again at some point. Understanding is a two-way street – and oftentimes the best way to make a relationship work in all manners of speaking is simply to be UNDERSTANDING!

is for ‘LEARNING’
Listen folks, we never stop learning – NEVER! We learn everyday and will always do so. When it comes to sex – learning is an ever evolving event. You need to learn all sorts of things when it comes to your partner and your sex life. We do not stay 100% the same when it comes to our sexual needs and desires. Especially when couples have been together for many years – the sexual fantasies or comfort level may advance and there may be new requirements for the sex in the relationship.

Being able to learn about your partner’s wants and needs is something that will always benefit you both. Being able to think about – and ask about – your partner’s evolving sexual needs and be open to learning what they want – is something that will go miles in the relationship. Also, if you are in the learning mood – there are tons of books, videos, talk forums (like TooTimid) available to help couples learn about sex and sexual techniques. Just like any other activity, there are many ways to satisfy your lover – and taking the time to learn some new ones is a great way to show your lover how thankful you are for them!

TIS THE SEASON…
Thanksgiving and Christmas time are great times of year to bring your relationship to the newest level. Remind yourself that Christmas presents are wonderful, thanksgiving dinners are tasty, and holiday parties are fun – but being with the love of your life and having them know how important they are to you is food for the soul! Take time this season to tell your lover just how thankful you are for them – and I will bet they will mirror the sentiment!